Crap, Watch This Instead
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- DirectorUwe BollStarsTil SchweigerEmmanuelle VaugierNatalia AvelonAn ex-special forces soldier turned boatman is hired by a journalist to investigate a top-secret military base on a nearby island.Crap
- DirectorDavid TwohyStarsMilla JovovichSteve ZahnTimothy OlyphantTwo pairs of lovers on a Hawaiian vacation discover that psychopaths are stalking and murdering tourists on the islands.Weird twist that makes no sense but is still better than Far Cry. Timothy Olpyhant is who makes this movie.
- DirectorJohn StockwellStarsJosh DuhamelMelissa GeorgeOlivia WildeA group of young backpackers' vacation turns sour when a bus accident leaves them marooned in a remote Brazilian rural area that holds an ominous secret.Also would recommend it if you want a movie similar to the Far Cry video games.
- DirectorBarry SonnenfeldStarsWill SmithKevin KlineKenneth BranaghThe two best special agents in the Wild West must save President Grant from the clutches of a diabolical, wheelchair-bound, steampunk-savvy, Confederate scientist bent on revenge for losing the Civil War.Crap
- DirectorTom DeyStarsJackie ChanOwen WilsonLucy LiuA Chinese man travels to the Wild West to rescue a kidnapped Princess. After teaming up with a train robber, the unlikely duo takes on a Chinese traitor and his corrupt boss.A better western/comedy than Wild Wild West.
- DirectorRobert ZemeckisStarsMichael J. FoxChristopher LloydMary SteenburgenStranded in 1955, Marty McFly learns about the death of Doc Brown in 1885 and must travel back in time to save him. With no fuel readily available for the DeLorean, the two must figure how to escape the Old West before Emmett is murdered.Also a good Western/Comedy.
- DirectorKevin SmithStarsBruce WillisTracy MorganJuan Carlos HernándezJimmy's rare baseball card is robbed. Since it's his only hope to pay for his daughter's upcoming wedding, he recruits his cop partner Paul to track down the robber, a memorabilia-obsessed gangster.Crap
- DirectorAdam McKayStarsWill FerrellMark WahlbergDerek JeterTwo mismatched New York City detectives seize an opportunity to step up like the city's top cops, whom they idolize, only things don't quite go as planned.Everything Kevin Smith wanted Cop Out to be.
- DirectorStewart RaffillStarsChristine EbersoleJonathan WardTina CasparyAn alien trying to escape from NASA is befriended by a wheelchair-bound boy.Crap
- DirectorRandal KleiserStarsJoey CramerPaul ReubensCliff De YoungIn 1978, a boy travels eight years into the future and has an adventure with an intelligent, wisecracking alien ship.E.T. is the too obvious choice to watch over Mac and Me. Here's something under-rated I'd recommend over it any day.
- DirectorPeter HowittStarsRowan AtkinsonJohn MalkovichNatalie ImbrugliaAfter a sudden attack on MI5, Johnny English, Britain's most confident, yet unintelligent spy, becomes Britain's only spy.Crap
- DirectorKevin DonovanStarsJackie ChanJennifer Love HewittJason IsaacsA hapless chauffeur must take a comatose Secret Agent's place using his special gadget-laden tuxedo.Crap
- DirectorPeter SegalStarsSteve CarellAnne HathawayAlan ArkinMaxwell Smart, a highly intellectual but bumbling spy working for the CONTROL agency, is tasked with preventing a terrorist attack from rival spy agency KAOS.A very funny and unappreciated spy comedy.
- DirectorJim AbrahamsDavid ZuckerJerry ZuckerStarsVal KilmerOmar SharifJeremy KempAn American rock and roll singer is invited to a cultural festival in East Germany in order to distract from a plot to destroy NATO submarines, but he accidentally becomes involved in a resistance plot to rescue an imprisoned scientist.Also a good spy comedy.
- DirectorJohn McTiernanStarsChris KleinJean RenoLL Cool JThe big thing in 2005 is a violent sport which can have some pretty serious consequences... like dying.Crap
- DirectorNorman JewisonStarsJames CaanJohn HousemanMaud AdamsIn a corporate-controlled future, an ultra-violent sport known as Rollerball represents the world, and one of its powerful athletes is out to defy those who want him out of the game.The original is far superior, like always.
- DirectorPaul Michael GlaserStarsArnold SchwarzeneggerMaria Conchita AlonsoYaphet KottoIn a dystopian America, a falsely convicted policeman gets his shot at freedom when he must forcibly participate in a TV game show where convicts, runners, must battle killers for their freedom.Most films of today even make bad films from the 80's look good.
- DirectorRalph BakshiStarsGabriel ByrneKim BasingerJanni BrennWhen Jack Deebs was behind bars he found escape by creating Cool World, a cartoon series featuring a vixen named Holli Would. The flesh proves weaker than ink, however, as Holli takes human form in Las Vegas.Crap
- DirectorRobert ZemeckisStarsBob HoskinsChristopher LloydJoanna CassidyWhen a cartoon rabbit is accused of murder, he enlists the help of a burnt out private investigator to prove his innocence.
- DirectorJoe DanteEric GoldbergStarsBrendan FraserJenna ElfmanSteve MartinThe Looney Tunes search for a man's missing father and the mythical Blue Monkey diamond.
- DirectorBrian LevantStarsJackie ChanAmber VallettaBilly Ray CyrusFormer C.I.A. spy Bob Ho takes on his toughest assignment to date: looking after his girlfriend's three kids, who haven't exactly warmed to their mom's beau.Crap
- DirectorAdam ShankmanStarsVin DieselBrittany SnowMax ThieriotHaving recovered from wounds received in a failed rescue operation, Navy SEAL Shane Wolfe is handed a new assignment: Protect the five Plummer kids from enemies of their recently deceased father -- a government scientist whose top-secret experiment remains in the kids' house.Crap
- DirectorMichael GottliebStarsHulk HoganSherman HemsleyAfa AnoaiA former professional wrestler is hired to be the bodyguard/nanny for a couple of bratty kids whose inventor father is being stalked by a rival.Crap
- DirectorIvan ReitmanStarsArnold SchwarzeneggerPenelope Ann MillerPamela ReedA tough cop must pose as a kindergarten teacher in order to locate a dangerous criminal's ex-wife, who may hold the key to putting him behind bars.Say what you will about Arnold but other action stars wouldn't have pulled this off as well or playing a pregnant dude in Junior either
- DirectorRob CohenStarsTyler PerryMatthew FoxRachel NicholsA homicide detective is pushed to the brink of his moral and physical limits as he tangles with a ferociously skilled hired killer who specializes in torture and pain.Crap, Tylor Perry taking Morgan Freeman's place as Alex Cross is worse than when Ben Afflick took Harrison Ford's place as Jack Ryan.
- DirectorGary FlederStarsMorgan FreemanAshley JuddCary ElwesPolice hunting for a serial kidnapper are helped when a victim manages to escape for the first time.
- DirectorLee TamahoriStarsMorgan FreemanMichael WincottMonica PotterWhen a senator's daughter under Secret Service protection is kidnapped from a private school, detective Alex Cross investigates the case even though he's recovering from the loss of his partner.
- DirectorRon HowardStarsJim CarreyTaylor MomsenKelleyOn the outskirts of Whoville lives a green, revenge-seeking Grinch who plans to ruin Christmas for all of the citizens of the town.Crap: Sorry but for 12 years I have barely been able to get through Jim Carrey yelling and over-acting his way through this movie.
- DirectorChuck JonesBen WashamStarsBoris KarloffJune ForayDal McKennonA grumpy hermit hatches a plan to steal Christmas from the Whos of Whoville.Longer and live action doesn't mean better.
- DirectorRenny HarlinStarsJohn CenaAshley ScottAidan GillenDetective Danny Fisher discovers his girlfriend has been kidnapped by an ex-con tied to Fisher's past, and he'll have to successfully complete 12 challenges in order to secure her safe release.Crap
- DirectorJohn McTiernanStarsBruce WillisJeremy IronsSamuel L. JacksonJohn McClane and a Harlem store owner are targeted by German terrorist Simon in New York City, where he plans to rob the Federal Reserve Building.
- DirectorRobert LuketicStarsKatherine HeiglAshton KutcherTom SelleckA vacationing woman meets her ideal man, leading to a swift marriage. Back at home, however, their idyllic life is upset when they discover their neighbors could be assassins who have been contracted to kill the couple.Crap
- DirectorJames MangoldStarsTom CruiseCameron DiazPeter SarsgaardA young woman gets mixed up with a disgraced spy who is trying to clear his name.
- DirectorRobert SchwentkeStarsBruce WillisHelen MirrenMorgan FreemanWhen his peaceful life is threatened by a high-tech assassin, former black-ops agent Frank Moses reassembles his old team in a last-ditch effort to survive and uncover his assailants.
- DirectorSam RaimiStarsTobey MaguireKirsten DunstTopher GraceA strange black entity from another world bonds with Peter Parker and causes inner turmoil as he contends with new villains, temptations, and revenge.Crap
- DirectorMarc WebbStarsAndrew GarfieldEmma StoneRhys IfansAfter Peter Parker is bitten by a genetically altered spider, he gains newfound, spider-like powers and ventures out to save the city from the machinations of a mysterious reptilian foe.
- DirectorSam RaimiStarsTobey MaguireKirsten DunstAlfred MolinaPeter Parker is beset with troubles in his failing personal life as he battles a former brilliant scientist named Otto Octavius.
- DirectorSam RaimiStarsTobey MaguireKirsten DunstWillem DafoeAfter being bitten by a genetically-modified spider, a shy teenager gains spider-like abilities that he uses to fight injustice as a masked superhero and face a vengeful enemy.
- DirectorLawrence KasdanStarsKevin CostnerDennis QuaidGene HackmanFrom Wichita to Dodge City, to the O.K. Corral in Tombstone, a man becomes a myth in this thrilling journey of romance, adventure, and desperate heroic action.Not crap but too long.
- DirectorGeorge P. CosmatosKevin JarreStarsKurt RussellVal KilmerSam ElliottA successful lawman's plans to retire anonymously in Tombstone, Arizona are disrupted by the kind of outlaws he was famous for eliminating.
- DirectorJohn SturgesStarsBurt LancasterKirk DouglasRhonda FlemingLawman Wyatt Earp and outlaw Doc Holliday form an unlikely alliance which culminates in their participation in the legendary Gunfight at the O.K. Corral.
- DirectorGary FlederStarsMichael DouglasSean BeanBrittany MurphyWhen the daughter of a psychiatrist is kidnapped, he's horrified to discover that the abductors' demand is that he break through to a post traumatic stress disorder suffering young woman who knows a secret...Decent but here's some better similar films:
- DirectorRon HowardStarsMel GibsonGary SiniseRene RussoMulti-millionaire Tom Mullen's son is kidnapped, but after initially agreeing to pay the ransom Mullen then decides to use the ransom money as a bounty.
- DirectorPierre MorelStarsLiam NeesonMaggie GraceFamke JanssenA retired CIA agent travels across Europe and relies on his old skills to save his estranged daughter, who has been kidnapped while on a trip to Paris.
- DirectorMcGStarsReese WitherspoonChris PineTom HardyC.I.A. operatives wage an epic battle on each other when they discover they are dating the same woman.Crap
- DirectorJames CameronStarsArnold SchwarzeneggerJamie Lee CurtisTom ArnoldA fearless, globe-trotting, terrorist-battling secret agent has his life turned upside down when he discovers his wife might be having an affair with a used-car salesman while terrorists smuggle nuclear war heads into the United States.A better romantic spy comedy for adults.
- DirectorRoland EmmerichStarsMatthew BroderickJean RenoMaria PitilloFrench nuclear tests irradiate an iguana into a giant monster that heads off to New York City. The American military must chase the monster across the city to stop it before it reproduces.Crap
- DirectorGareth EdwardsStarsAaron Taylor-JohnsonElizabeth OlsenBryan CranstonThe world is beset by the appearance of monstrous creatures, but one of them may be the only one who can save humanity.