'The First Kiss' is proficiently directed and beautifully photographed among Maryland's riverside locations, but is harmed by Fay Wray's lacklustre performance and by a ludicrous script. When I saw the retro comedy 'Movie Movie' (1978), I laughed that Harry Hamlin's character (a prizefighter with jurist aspirations) was able to get through law school 'as fast as possible' so that he could become an instantaneous district attorney and personally prosecute the movie's villain. But 'Movie Movie' was intentionally ludicrous; here, we have a drama in which Gary Cooper's three layabout brothers suddenly acquire ambition and become a doctor, a lawyer and a clergyman with the same miraculous speed that Hamlin became an instant D.A.
The Talbot family of Maryland were once respectable but have now gone far down the social scale. The family's paterfamilias, identified in the titles as 'Pap', is an old drunkard. Three of his four sons are worthless skivers: one of them has a girl's name (Carol) and is played by a male actor ditto (Leslie). The only ambitious one in the bunch is the other brother, Mulligan Talbot (Gary Cooper), who plies the shoals of Maryland as an oyster dredger! (Does he put the oysters into Mulligan stew?) And there's yet another brother, Lawrence Talbot, who ran off to Wales to become a werewolf. (Oops, wrong movie.)
SPOILERS THROUGHOUT. Mulligan is in love with Anna Lee (Fay Wray; attractive here, but giving a dull performance), whose family are farther up the social ladder than the Talbots. Anna Lee's parents disapprove of them getting married, because Mulligan's family are trash. As if to verify that point, Pap Talbot drops dead with a whisky flask in his hand.
Mulligan pledges to upgrade his family by putting his brothers through medical school, law school and divinity school. But t'ain't easy to do this on an oyster dredger's wage packet. So he decides to raise the tuition money by becoming a river pirate ... conveniently vowing to give back the money after his brothers graduate. Does anyone see what's wrong with this plot line?
Miraculously, Pirate Cooper doesn't get caught until the very moment when his brothers have earned back their tuition ... and, just before he can make good his thefts, Cooper gets arrested. But now he's got a priest, a doctor and a lawyer in the family, so guess what happens.
The authentic locations and excellent photography are assets, but basically this is a movie in which three borderline hillbillies become instant graduates of law school, medical school and divinity school. Huh? My rating: just barely 3 out of 10.
The Talbot family of Maryland were once respectable but have now gone far down the social scale. The family's paterfamilias, identified in the titles as 'Pap', is an old drunkard. Three of his four sons are worthless skivers: one of them has a girl's name (Carol) and is played by a male actor ditto (Leslie). The only ambitious one in the bunch is the other brother, Mulligan Talbot (Gary Cooper), who plies the shoals of Maryland as an oyster dredger! (Does he put the oysters into Mulligan stew?) And there's yet another brother, Lawrence Talbot, who ran off to Wales to become a werewolf. (Oops, wrong movie.)
SPOILERS THROUGHOUT. Mulligan is in love with Anna Lee (Fay Wray; attractive here, but giving a dull performance), whose family are farther up the social ladder than the Talbots. Anna Lee's parents disapprove of them getting married, because Mulligan's family are trash. As if to verify that point, Pap Talbot drops dead with a whisky flask in his hand.
Mulligan pledges to upgrade his family by putting his brothers through medical school, law school and divinity school. But t'ain't easy to do this on an oyster dredger's wage packet. So he decides to raise the tuition money by becoming a river pirate ... conveniently vowing to give back the money after his brothers graduate. Does anyone see what's wrong with this plot line?
Miraculously, Pirate Cooper doesn't get caught until the very moment when his brothers have earned back their tuition ... and, just before he can make good his thefts, Cooper gets arrested. But now he's got a priest, a doctor and a lawyer in the family, so guess what happens.
The authentic locations and excellent photography are assets, but basically this is a movie in which three borderline hillbillies become instant graduates of law school, medical school and divinity school. Huh? My rating: just barely 3 out of 10.
