A Connecticut Yankee (1931)

William Farnum: King Arthur, Inventor

Photos 

Quotes 

• Hank Martin : Yes, sir, we're getting the supply here, and then I'll create the demand. All you got to do is to persuade people they need things that they've been happy without all their lives.

  King Arthur : And by what magic wilt thou do this?

  Hank Martin : Ah, by a special magic called advertising.

  King Arthur : Advertising. Hmm. Is it a potent charm?

  Hank Martin : Ah, potent? Say, it makes you spend money you haven't got for things you don't want.

• Inventor : If I can build a set sensitive enough, I can tune back into the past - and hear those sounds. Think! Think of hearing Lincoln's own voice delivering the Gettysburg Address, of tuning in on Burke's farewell to Parliament.

  Hank Martin : You know, what Cleopatra said to Mark Antony wouldn't make bad listenin' either.

• Inventor : I've got it. I've got it! I knew I was right. I've tuned back fourteen hundred years. I've got the Court of King Arthur!

  Hank Martin : I don't - I don't care about listenin' to King Arthur and his Court. I'm goin' home and get Amos 'n' Andy.

• Hank Martin : Did you ever hear of anybody around here named Sir Rogers di Claremore?

  Inventor : There's a province of Claremore nearby. But, it hath no Lord. Nor, have I ever heard of the knight that ye named.

• King Arthur : Monster, thou art not well spoken. It hath been said thou art a magician. Is this true?

  Hank Martin : I'm just a Democrat!

• King Arthur : What title wouldest thou bare? By what name wouldest thou be called?

  Hank Martin : Oh I - I'm just kinda like Mussolini. I - I don't want any title. I just - I just like to be the boss, that's all.

• Hank Martin : Hey, King! You better turn us loose, right away. Because, if you don't, I'm sure gonna put the ol' Yankee Curse on you.

  King Arthur : What's this thou? Speak!

  Merlin : Believe him not, sire. He lyeth.

  Hank Martin : All right, King! You asked for it, now, you're gonna get it!

  [waving his arms at the Sun] 

  Hank Martin : Prosperity! Farm Relief! Freedom for Ireland! And light wines and beer!

  [eclipse of the Sun] 

• Hank Martin : I can't let anything happen to him. He's my ancestor. Why, he's my Great Great - well, I don't know how Great Grandfather! Why, if he goes out and gets killed, I'll never get to be born!

  King Arthur : Thou speaks in riddles.

• Hank Martin : Well, I - I'm no prophet, but, under the circumstances, I do feel like I'm one of the few men that can look backwards and see ahead! You know, you're gonna - you're gonna be the sire of a mighty substantial race of people, with great courage and a determination and a bull-headedness that's - that's gonna be the envy of the whole world - in days to come. You're gonna have lots of wars and you're gonna get distant colonies. And in years to come, one of your biggest colonies, you're gonna lose it. And you're gonna - you're gonna feel awful bad when you lose it. But, about 155 years from the time that you lose it, why, you're gonna - you're gonna give praise for its loss.

  King Arthur : Strange.

  Hank Martin : And-and-and you, King Arthur, with your Knights and your Round Table, why you're going down in history as a great orac-oracle and gastronomical success. You're gonna be the origination of the cursed banquet table and its speeches. Why your empire is gonna - gonna control the seven seas. And - and the Sun is never gonna set on your nation. But, you'll always make bad coffee.

• King Arthur : Hail, Sir Boss!

  Hank Martin : Hail, King! Excuse me for buttin' in. I didn't know you and the Ku Klux was holdin' a conference.

• Hank Martin : I've helped you out on a few things, King, and I'd like to ask a little favor of you.

  King Arthur : Ask thy favor.

  Hank Martin : Well, take Clarence here and let him kneel down, like you did with me, there, and hit him over the back with that cheese-knife and make a Knight out of him.

• Hank Martin : I'm not gonna fight. No, I'm gonna - my plan is to arbitrate. You know, there wouldn't have been half as many wars if there'd been a little soft soap beforehand.

  King Arthur : Thou knowest not my sister.

  Hank Martin : Well, she's a woman, ain't she? She'll talk.

• King Arthur : Liar!

  Hank Martin : Cock-eyed liar!