The Dragon Murder Case (1934)

Etienne Girardot: Dr. Doremus

Quotes 

• Dr. Doremus : [to Markham, angered that there is no body]  I can't perform an autopsy on a theory! I'm a coroner, not a philosopher!

• Sergeant Ernest Heath : [Arriving at the crime scene]  Well, where's the body?

  Sergeant Ernest Heath : I'm afraid there ain't any, Doc.

  Dr. Doremus : [Annoyed]  You called me away from my breakfast for nothing?

  Sergeant Ernest Heath : Well, at least you got a sniff at it. That's more than we've had.

  Dr. Doremus : Well, where was the body when you phoned?

  Sergeant Ernest Heath : We thought it was in the pool.

  Dr. Doremus : [Annoyed]  I don't want thoughts; I want bodies, and when there aren't any bodies, I want to be left alone!

• Dr. Doremus : Ernest, it's clear that you don't know much about women. Now I'll tell you, women are, generally speaking...

  Sergeant Ernest Heath : You certainly said it! They ARE generally speaking!

• Dr. Doremus : [Leaving the scene, thoroughly annoyed that the body was not dead]  Now I'm going to get some breakfast...

  [turning for one last word] 

  Dr. Doremus : ... and, Heath, don't you call me out here again unless you've got a corpse. I'm here as a coroner, not as a doctor!

  Sergeant Ernest Heath : [shouting after him sarcastically]  Why don't you learn to carry a hard-boiled egg in your pocket?

• Dr. Doremus : [Sgt. Heath has been called to the phone]  If it's my wife, tell her I've gone.

  Sergeant Ernest Heath : That'll please her!

• Dr. Doremus : Now you take my wife...

  Sergeant Ernest Heath : You keep her. I can't use her!