Little Red Walking Hood (1937)

Tedd Pierce: Wolf, Audience Member

Quotes 

• Elmer : [after hearing a recurring unknown little man now named Elmer re-appear, that's lightly whistling a tune, the wolf's curiosity and temper quickly rises irately] 

  Wolf : Hey, bud! Hey, just a minute, bud! Now who the heck are you anyway?

  Elmer : Who, me?

  [Hits wolf with a mallet, knocking him out] 

  Elmer : *chuckles* I'm the hero in this picture! *chuckles*

  Elmer : [Iris closes, irises opens to show Elmer starts kissing Little Red Walking Hood continuously & his kissing continued as the iris re-closes] 

• Wolf : [a la Elmer Blurt]  *knocks door* I hope the old Grandma's to home. I hope, I hope, I hope, I hope.

  Grandma : Who's there?

  Wolf : [clears throat, does a high-pitched girly voice]  It's me, Little Red Riding Habit.

  [Grandma looks at the peeping hatch with the wolf heading in] 

  Grandma : [shuts hatch]  Woo! Wolf, stay away from my door!

• [Grandma whoops and hollers while escaping from the wolf until the phone rings] 

  Grandma : [gets on a chair and crosses her fingers]  Uh-uh, King's X.

  [Wolf forces to wait while Grandma answers the phone] 

  Grandma : Hello? Hello? Oh, yes.

  Grandma : [to the audience]  Would you people pardon me just a minute.

  Grandma : Eh, let me see. 1 dozen eggs.

  Grandma : [to the audience]  It's the grocer, folks. Heh...

  Grandma : A pound of butter, 1 head of lettuce, a can of peas, another batch of summer squash...

  Wolf : Aw, come on, Grandma!

  Grandma : ...a lemon pie and a... case of gin. Goodbye.

  [Hangs up phone] 

  Grandma : *whoops* Here we go again!

  [resumes chasing] 

• Wolf : [posing as Grandma]  Uh, come in.

  Little Red Walking Hood : But Grandmother, what large eyes you have?

  Wolf : All the better to see you with, my dear.

  Little Red Walking Hood : And Grandmother, what a large schnozzola you have

  Wolf : I can't hear very good. Come a little clo-o-o-ser.

  Little Red Walking Hood : And Grandmother...

  Little Red Walking Hood : [to the audience]  Rather childish and a bit silly, don't you think?

  Little Red Walking Hood : What enormous teeth you possess?

  Wolf : [chases Red]  Yeah, well, it's all the better to eat you with!