Ball of Fire (1941)
Richard Haydn: Prof. Oddly
Photos
Quotes
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Joe Lilac : [as the professors draw guns on Joe and his men] What is this?
Prof. Oddly : I believe... I think it is known as an "up-stick."
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Professor Bertram Potts : I've just finished my article on slang. Twenty-three pages compiled from a dozen reference books, eight hundred examples.
Prof. Robinson : Well?
Professor Bertram Potts : Everything from the idiotic combination of "absotively" to the pajorative use of "zigzag." I traced the evolution of "hunky-dory," tracked down "skidoo" from "skedaddle." Eight-hundred examples and I may as well throw it in the wastebasket. Three weeks work...
Prof. Robinson : You're hysterical.
Professor Bertram Potts : Outmoded... based on reference books twenty years old. Take "smooch," take "dish," take, uh...
Prof. Oddly : "Hoi toi toi?"
Professor Bertram Potts : "Hoi toi toi." Not one of them included.
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Garbage Man : I could use a bundle of scratch right now on account of I met me a mouse last week.
Prof. Oddly : Mouse?
Garbage Man : What a pair of gams. A little in, a little out, and a little more out.
Professor Bertram Potts : I am still completely mystified.
Garbage Man : Well, with this dish on me hands and them giving away 25 smackaroos on that quizzola.
Professor Bertram Potts : Smackaroos?
Prof. Oddly : Smackaroos? What are smackaroos?
Garbage Man : A smackaroo is a...
Professor Bertram Potts : No such word exists.
Garbage Man : Oh, it don't, huh? A smackaroo is a dollar, pal.
Professor Bertram Potts : Well, the accepted vulgarism for a dollar is a buck.
Garbage Man : The accepted vulgarism for a smackaroo is a dollar. That goes for a banger, a fish, a buck, or a rug.
Professor Bertram Potts : Well, what about the mouse?
Garbage Man : The mouse is the dish. That's what I need the moolah for.
Prof. Oddly : Moolah?
Garbage Man : Yeah, the dough. We'll be stepping. Me and the smooch - I mean, the dish, I mean, the mouse. You know, hit the jiggles for a little drum boogie.
Professor Bertram Potts : Please, please, not so fast.
Garbage Man : Brother, we're going to have some hoytoytoy.
Prof. Oddly , Prof. Robinson , Prof. Jerome , Prof. Gurkakoff , Prof. Magenbruch , Prof. Quintana : Hoytoytoy?
Garbage Man : Yeah, and if you want that one explained, you go ask your papas.
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Professor Bertram Potts : I've just finished my article on slang. Twenty-three pages compiled from a dozen reference books. Eight hundred examples. Everything from the idiotic combination "absotively" to the pejorative use of "zigzag." I traced the evolution of "hunky dory," tracked down "skiddo" from "skedaddle." Eight hundred examples and I may as well throw it in the waste basket. Three weeks' work.
Prof. Robinson : Potts, you're hysterical.
Professor Bertram Potts : Outmoded. Based on reference books 20 years old. Take "smooch." Take "dish." Take...
Prof. Oddly : Hoytoytoy?
Professor Bertram Potts : Hoytoytoy. Not one of them included. Living in this house cut off from the world, I've lost touch. And it's inexcusable! That man talked a living language. I embalmed some dead phrases.
Prof. Gurkakoff : But where are you going?
Professor Bertram Potts : Out to collect new data, to tap the sources of slang, the major sources. The streets. The slums. The theatrical and allied professions.
Prof. Robinson : Oh, now, Potts, don't you think that...
Professor Bertram Potts : I know it's regrettable, this loss of time, gentlemen, but it must be done. Leave the key under the mat. I won't be home before 9 o'clock.
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Prof. Quintana : Potts, could you tell us what was it like backstage?
Prof. Oddly : Very vivacious, I imagine.
Prof. Gurkakoff : And perhaps, ballerinas giggling up and down iron staircases.
Prof. Magenbruch : Around and around.
Prof. Jerome : Possibly wearing tights.
Prof. Robinson : Tights...
Prof. Oddly : And that ineffable smell of rice powder.
Prof. Peagram : On nude shoulders.
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Sugarpuss O'Shea : Any message?
Prof. Peagram : Well, they spoke very picturesquely.
Prof. Robinson : Yeah, very.
Prof. Oddly : Yes, they said it's getting hot and hotter and to stay in the icebox like a good little salad.
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Prof. Magenbruch : Did you get the records?
Prof. Robinson : Well, they were all out of "Beat Me Daddy, Eight to the Bar".
Prof. Oddly : Oh, dear, oh, dear.
Prof. Robinson : But I got "Chicka Chicka Boom Boom" and "Shoot the Sherbet to Me Herbert".
Sugarpuss O'Shea : Oh, now watch us go!
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Prof. Oddly : Being a botanist, I find an astonishing parallel between a woman's heart and the wind flower or Anemone nemorosa. Perhaps you know the plant, how it waits for the warm sunshine and soft winds before it unfolds its petals. Sensitive and delicate. One rough, impetuous bee can completely destroy the bloom.