Ball of Fire (1941)

Allen Jenkins: Garbage Man

Quotes 

• Garbage Man : I could use a bundle of scratch right now on account of I met me a mouse last week.

  Prof. Oddly : Mouse?

  Garbage Man : What a pair of gams. A little in, a little out, and a little more out.

  Professor Bertram Potts : I am still completely mystified.

  Garbage Man : Well, with this dish on me hands and them giving away 25 smackaroos on that quizzola.

  Professor Bertram Potts : Smackaroos?

  Prof. Oddly : Smackaroos? What are smackaroos?

  Garbage Man : A smackaroo is a...

  Professor Bertram Potts : No such word exists.

  Garbage Man : Oh, it don't, huh? A smackaroo is a dollar, pal.

  Professor Bertram Potts : Well, the accepted vulgarism for a dollar is a buck.

  Garbage Man : The accepted vulgarism for a smackaroo is a dollar. That goes for a banger, a fish, a buck, or a rug.

  Professor Bertram Potts : Well, what about the mouse?

  Garbage Man : The mouse is the dish. That's what I need the moolah for.

  Prof. Oddly : Moolah?

  Garbage Man : Yeah, the dough. We'll be stepping. Me and the smooch - I mean, the dish, I mean, the mouse. You know, hit the jiggles for a little drum boogie.

  Professor Bertram Potts : Please, please, not so fast.

  Garbage Man : Brother, we're going to have some hoytoytoy.

  Prof. Oddly , Prof. Robinson , Prof. Jerome , Prof. Gurkakoff , Prof. Magenbruch , Prof. Quintana : Hoytoytoy?

  Garbage Man : Yeah, and if you want that one explained, you go ask your papas.

• Prof. Peagram : Cleopatra, queen of Egypt, daughter of Ptolemy Xlll, born 69 BC, killed herself on the 29th day of August, 30 BC, by placing an asp to her bosom.

  Garbage Man : A what?

  Prof. Peagram : An asp. A small snake.

• Professor Bertram Potts : There's another word I'd like to take up now. It's recurred several times in our discussions and its meaning still eludes me. I think it was Miss O'Shea who used it yesterday in reference to the cuffs that I wear. The word is "corny."

  Sugarpuss O'Shea : Yeah, wouldn't you say they were corny?

  Professor Bertram Potts : Because of the cornstarch in them?

  Sugarpuss O'Shea : Because it's 1941.

  Professor Bertram Potts : Then corny means old fashioned.

  Sugarpuss O'Shea : Kind of hick, loose-tooth.

  Garbage Man : Mortimer Snerd. Oh, geez.

  College Boy : There's other kinds of corn, too. When you give your girl your fraternity pin, well, if she says, "I'll keep it forever," - that's corny too.

  Newsboy : Yeah or take a joke. "That's no lady, that's my wife."

  Garbage Man : Making your baby's shoes into ashtrays. That's corn.

  Sugarpuss O'Shea : Right off the cob.

  Professor Bertram Potts : Well, let's stick with corn. Is it synonymous with baloney?

  Newsboy : No, it's anything that gets them in the sticks.

  Garbage Man : "Long time, no see, " that's Indian corn.

  Sugarpuss O'Shea : Yeah, when a guy comes to see a girl and says, "Let's turn off the lights, it hurts my eyes." Brother, that's corn.

  Professor Bertram Potts : The implication is he's trying to pull some hoytoytoy?

  Sugarpuss O'Shea : You're catching on, Professor.

  Professor Bertram Potts : Countrified, old-fashioned, sentimental.