- Porky Pig: This is a d-d-d-doberman pinscher, you are a pinscher aren't you doberpuss?
- Doberman Pinscher: Yeah I'm a pinscher!,
- [grabs a dog's butt]
- Doberman Pinscher: pinch!, pinch!, pinch!
- [laughs hysterically]
- Title Card: [shows Porky using a meat grinder full of baloney like a camera rolling] EYES, EARS, NOSE and THROAT of the WORLD
- Title Card: [FIREPLUG, PA] ANNUAL DOG SHOW OPENING
- Porky Pig: [à la Lew Lehr] Ho-ho-ho! Pi-pi-puppies is the cwaziest people! Ho-ho-ho!
- Title Card: [WETT, WASH] SWOLLEN RIVER FLOODS TOWN
- Narrator: Each spring, the little town of Wett, Washington, is almost completely inundated. Here is the town's tallest inhabitant: Long John Sliver.
- [shows a very tall, backwoods man walking across the flooded waters below his shoulders]
- Narrator: Say, Long John, don't these floods ever bother you at all?
- Long John Sliver: Naw, they don't bother me none...
- Long John Sliver: [sped up] But my wife is very unhappy.
- [shows his angry wife rather waterlogged]
- Title Card: POISONALTIES IN THE BIG NEWS
- Title Card: [KEGLINED, KAN] TAX EXPERT OFFERS FINANCIAL ADVICE
- Tax Expert: Are you people are saps if you pay any income tax? The smart guys like me skip it. Last year, I got tired of paying out dough, so I don't file a return. I save myself a bit of change and my outlook for this year is better than ever.
- [the man actually ends up in a Federal Prison for Tax Evasion]