Quotes
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Tommy Chan : Pop, I've got a case that will knock your hat off!
Charlie Chan : Can remove hat without assistance, thank you.
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Charlie Chan : You talk like rooster, who thinks sun come up just to hear him crow.
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Tommy Chan : My gosh, Pop, are you a mind reader?
Charlie Chan : If mind not too small.
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Charlie Chan : You should get married and raise large family. Once you have large family, all other troubles mean nothing.
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Tommy Chan : You're lucky to have your assistant on hand, Pop.
Charlie Chan : Assistant? That you?
Tommy Chan : Sure!
Charlie Chan : Your assistance about as welcome as water in a leaking ship!
Tommy Chan : But you've always said that two men can find a clue quicker than one.
Charlie Chan : [looking from side to side] Where is other man? Do not see other man!
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Charlie Chan : Not glad to see me, Birmingham?
Birmingham Brown, Taxi Driver : Oh, it's nothing personal, Mr. Chan, but the last time we met was in Washington, and if I can remember right, there was two or three murders.
Charlie Chan : Murder is my business.
Birmingham Brown, Taxi Driver : Murder's all right, Mr. Chan, but you wholesales it!
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Tommy Chan : And besides, didn't I get you a swell case?
Charlie Chan : Every time you appear, I have swell case of assorted troubles.
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Tommy Chan : I don't get it, Pop!
Charlie Chan : [laconically] Fear you are weak limb to which no family tree may point with pride.
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Charlie Chan : You are smart enough to keep eyes open?
Tommy Chan : You bet!
Charlie Chan : Do likewise - keep mouth shut!
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Charlie Chan : [to Tommy] You put two and two together and get result bigger than national debt.
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Charlie Chan : [to Tommy as he looks over Charlie's shoulder] Please remove breath from back of my neck! Go away! Go away!
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Charlie Chan : [to a semi-conscious Tommy] How you feeling?
Tommy Chan : My head seems to be spinning.
Charlie Chan : Oh. Then you're all right. Everything back to normal.
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Charlie Chan : [to Tommy] Next time you try this, you experience sudden collision in rear end of pants.
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Charlie Chan : Never start anything unless I see end of road.
Dr. Paul Recknik : How are you coming along to date?
Charlie Chan : Did not say which end of road I could see.
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Charlie Chan : [looking at funhouse figures] See one with no head?
Tommy Chan : Un-huh.
Charlie Chan : He remind me of you.
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Tommy Chan : [entering room where Charlie is being held by thugs] Hi ya, Pa! What're you doing in there?
Charlie Chan : [laconically] Like puppy who come to smell subway third rail, you will receive complete information in few moments.
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Birmingham Brown, Taxi Driver : [after knocking bad guy unconscious by breaking flashlight over his head] Uh-oh! Mr. Chan, I ruined your flashlight!
Charlie Chan : [looking at bad guy on the floor] Even trade... his light out, too!
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Charlie Chan : Bull in china shop is gentle creature compared to detective who make pass at man wearing glasses.
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Charlie Chan : Three murders. All different. Dog cannot chase three rabbits at same time. Manning Case like modern highway. Sooner or later come to detour.
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Charlie Chan : You are like turtle. After everything all over, you stick head out and find truth right under your very nose.