- Cole Armin: What's the matter with these folks? You'd think I had smallpox!
- Juke: Son, I'd rather have smallpox than the name of Armin in this town.
- Cole Armin: [to the crooked sheriff] You know, in Texas if the law don't move fast enough, a rope and a tree is the payoff for robbin' women and cold-blooded shoootin'.
- Stage Passenger with Juke: You and Pearl figure on holy matrimony?
- Juke: She don't like my whiskers.
- Stage Passenger with Juke: Then why don't you whack them off?
- Juke: Oh, Pearl wants me to, but I keep thinkin' about Samson.
- Stage Passenger with Juke: You mean Samson,the little tailor in Albuquerque?
- Juke: No, you heathen. Samson was a king. Lived in Egypt or Afrikee or someplace like that.
- Stage Passenger with Juke: Well, what about him?
- Juke: Well, he had a mane and whiskers just like mine. Strongest fella you ever seen. Pushed buildings over with his bare hands. Yes, sir. He had a gal, too, named Delilah.
- Stage Passenger with Juke: Didn't she like whiskers either?
- Juke: No, sir. Snuck in one night, clipped Samson slicker than a frog's belly. After that he was so durn weak, couldn't even break a toothpick!