Pandora and the Magic Box (1965)

William Donaldson: Theseus, Erg

Quotes 

• Maitre D' : Don't I know you from somewhere? Have you been here before?

  Theseus : Yes, I've been in Crete before, but for a good number of years I've been abroad.

  Maitre D' : Well you...

  [stops short, in astonishment] 

  Maitre D' : you've been a broad?

  [Theseus smiles his assent. Maitre D' turns the very hairy Theseus, front, back, all around, searching fruitlessly for the slightest hint of soft, smooth female pulchritude, so intently that Theseus feels self-conscious in his skimpy toga, and covers his crotch and buttocks with his hands] 

  Maitre D' : Well, all I can say is, that surgeon,

  [searching for words] 

  Maitre D' : uh, he did a good job on you!

  [Theseus looks puzzled] 

  Maitre D' : Well, what can I do for you sir, or whatever?