James Bond:
Is this the only room there is?
Kissy Suzuki:
Yes. That is your bed,
[
points to one side of room]
Kissy Suzuki:
I shall sleep over there.
[
points to other side of room]
James Bond:
But we're supposed to be married.
Kissy Suzuki:
Think again, please. You gave false name to priest.
James Bond:
Yes, but we must keep up appearances. We're on our honeymoon.
Kissy Suzuki:
No honeymoon. This is business.
James Bond:
[
pushing aside his oyster dinner] Well, I won't need these.
Helga Brandt:
[
Bond is captured by Helga Brandt] I've got you now.
James Bond:
Well, enjoy yourself.
[
Brandt slaps him]
[
about to make love to Helga Brandt]
James Bond:
Oh the things I do for England.
Aki:
I think I will enjoy very much serving under you.
Aki:
You wouldn't touch that horrible woman, would you?
James Bond:
Oh heaven forbid.
[
Coded message to headquarters]
James Bond:
Little Nelly got a hot reception. Four big shots made improper advances toward her, but she defended her honor with great success.
Russian Diplomat:
The world knows we are a peace-loving people.
Tiger Tanaka:
It can save your life, this cigarette.
James Bond:
You sound like a commercial.
Blofeld:
I shall look forward personally to exterminating you, Mr. Bond.
Blofeld:
The firing power inside my crater is enough to annihilate a small army. You can watch it all on TV. It's the last program you're likely to see.
James Bond:
Well, if I'm gonna be forced to watch television, may I smoke?
Blofeld:
Yes. Give him his cigarettes. It won't be the nicotine that kills you, Mr. Bond.
Blofeld:
Goodbye, Mr. Bond!
Blofeld:
Kill Bond! Now!
Blofeld:
[
shows the x-ray of the PPK to Osato & Brandt] Only one person we know uses this sort of gun. James Bond.
Mr. Osato:
But Bond is dead!
Helga Brandt:
It was in all the newspapers!
Blofeld:
Rubbish. Bond is alive. Unless you killed him, Mr. Osato. Don't tell me you let him go.
Mr. Osato:
I gave Number 11 the strictest orders to eliminate him.
Blofeld:
And did she?
Mr. Osato:
She failed.
Helga Brandt:
[
to Osato] *You* should have killed him yourself. You had plenty of opportunities...
Blofeld:
This organization does not tolerate failure.
Mr. Osato:
I know, but do you see I...
Blofeld:
GO!
[
Osato crosses the bridge over the water where the piranha are waiting]
Blofeld:
[
addressing Helga] Well.
[
Helga starts across. Blofeld hits a pedal that causes the bridge bottom to drop out, sending Helga into the piranha-filled water. The lethal fish immediately converge on her and she is dead in seconds. Osato looks on in horror]
Blofeld:
[
addressing Osato] Kill Bond! Now!
Mr. Osato:
Yes, Number One! Yes. Yes, yes.
[
Bond has just sent Blofeld's henchman into the water. The piranha immediately attack him]
James Bond:
Bon appetit!
Blofeld:
James Bond. Allow me to introduce myself. I am Ernst Stavro Blofeld. They told me you were assassinated in Hong Kong.
James Bond:
Yes, this is my second life.
Blofeld:
You only live twice, Mr. Bond.
Tiger Tanaka:
Permit me to introduce myself. I am Tanaka. Please call me Tiger.
James Bond:
If you're Tanaka, then how do you feel about me?
Tiger Tanaka:
[
the code response] I... love you.
James Bond:
Well, I'm glad we got that out of the way.
[
Being bathed by Tanaka's women]
Tiger Tanaka:
You know what it is about you that fascinates them, don't you? It's the hair on your chest. Japanese men all have beautiful bare skin.
James Bond:
Japanese proverb say, "Bird never make nest in bare tree."
[
James is in bed with a Ling, a Chinese woman]
James Bond:
Why do Chinese girls taste different from all other girls?
Ling:
You think we better, huh?
James Bond:
No, just different. Like Peking Duck is different from Russian Caviar. But I love them both.
Ling:
Darling, I give you very best duck.
[
Choosing a masseuse]
James Bond:
Well, I'll just settle for this little old lady here.
Tiger Tanaka:
Good choice, she's very sexyful.
[
Bond is caught trying to enter the SPECTRE spacecraft]
Blofeld:
You made a mistake, my friend. No astronaut would enter the capsule carrying his air conditioner.
[
Bond is about to have his chest waxed so he can pass for Japanese]
James Bond:
Why don't you just dye the parts that show?
Tiger Tanaka:
Rule number one: never do anything yourself when someone else can do it for you.
James Bond:
And rule number two?
Tiger Tanaka:
Rule number two: in Japan, men come first, women come second.
James Bond:
I just might retire to here.
Tiger Tanaka:
I must say I am disappointed with the ease with which I could pull you in. The one thing my honourable mother taught me long ago was never to get into a car with a strange girl. But you, I'm afraid, will get into anything. With any girl.
MoneyPenny:
Oh, by the way, how was the girl?
James Bond:
(turns the lamp towards her, interrogation style) Which girl?
MoneyPenny:
The... uh... Chinese one we set you up with?
James Bond:
Another few minutes and I would have found out.
[
Blofeld has demanded an advance payment of $100 million in gold]
Blofeld's Financier:
Our agreement states quite clearly that no money should be paid until war has broken out between Russia and the United States.
Financier #2:
This is extortion!
Blofeld:
[
shows his SPECTRE ring] Extortion is my business. Go away and think it over, gentlemen. I'm busy.
Blofeld:
As you can see, I am about to inaugurate a little war. In a matter of hours after America and Russia have annihilated each other. We shall see a new power dominating the world.
Henderson:
That was stirred, not shaken?
[
first lines]
Astronaut - 1st American Spacecraft:
Calling CapCom. CapCom, this is Jupiter 16. Do you give a go for fourth orbit.
Houston CapCom:
CapCom to Jupiter 16. Can you confirm O2 pressure is within limit.
Astronaut - 1st American Spacecraft:
Roger. Everything looks good in the environmental control system.
Houston CapCom:
Okay. Everything looks good from here. You have a go for fourth orbit.
[
last lines]
Submarine Captain:
Dinghy's on board, sir.
M:
[
referring to Bond in the dinghy] Tell him to come below and report.
MoneyPenny:
It'll be a pleasure, sir.
Mr. Osato:
You should give up smoking. Cigarettes are very bad for your chest.
Helga Brandt:
Mr. Osato believes in healthy chest.
[
Bond eyes Helga's breasts]
James Bond:
Really?
Tiger Tanaka:
[
to James Bond] Welcome to Japan, Mr. Bond.
Tiger Tanaka:
[
after Tiger's helicopter drops an enemy car chasing Bond and Aki into the Pacific ocean] How's that for Japanese efficiency?
James Bond:
Just a drop in the ocean.
Foreign Secretary:
As a matter of fact, our man in Hong Kong is working on it now.
[
cuts to next scene in Hong Kong, Bond is in bed with a Chinese woman]
Tiger Tanaka:
[
discussing Osato Chemicals' supertanker, the Ning Po, which is known to be smuggling rocket fuel] We shadowed the Ning Po to the outer islands.
Aki:
It was very dark. Hard to see her all the time.
Tiger Tanaka:
But we know she stopped somewhere. Look at these photos.
[
Tiger hands James photos of the Ning Po]
Aki:
Look at the water line.
James Bond:
[
noticing the higher water line of the ship in seperate photos] You're right. Fully laden here, and empty here.
James Bond:
[
getting up] I want to take a look at the island now. Is Little Nellie here?
Tiger Tanaka:
Yes. And her father.
[
James, Aki, and Tiger enter a nearby garage where an agitated and sweating Q is waiting]
James Bond:
[
sarcastically] Welcome to Japan, Dad. Is my little girl hot and ready?
Q:
[
annoyed] Look, 007, I've had a long and tiring journey, probably to no purpose, so I'm in no mood for juvenile quips.
M:
[
buzzing intercom] Miss Moneypenny, give 007 the password we've agreed with Japanese S.I.S.
MoneyPenny:
Yes sir.
[
to Bond]
MoneyPenny:
We tried to think of something that you wouldn't forget.
James Bond:
Yes?
MoneyPenny:
"I, love, you". Repeat it please, to make sure you get it
James Bond:
Don't worry, I get it.
James Bond:
Uggghhh... Siamese vodka?
James Bond:
Do you have any commandos here?
Tiger Tanaka:
I have much, much better. Ninjas. Top-secret, Bond-san. This is my ninja training school.
Hong Kong Policeman #2:
[
finding Bond 'dead' in girl's bed] At least he died on the job... he would have wanted it that way.
Houston CapCom:
Hawaii to Jupiter 16. Repeat: Hawaii to Jupiter 16. There is an unidentified object on our screen, closing fast.
Astronaut - American Spacecraft #1:
[
Performing an EVA] We see nothing. Can you give me a bearing?
Houston CapCom:
Appears to be coming up fast from astern
Astronaut - American Spacecraft #1:
Hey, NOW I see it. It's another spacecraft! I repeat: it's ANOTHER SPACECRAFT!
Houston CapCom:
Chris, this is flight. Does it look like a close pass?
Astronaut - American Spacecraft #1:
You're breaking up. Say again!
Houston CapCom:
Repeat: Does it look like a close pass?
Astronaut - 1st American Spacecraft:
[
inside spacecraft] Hey Chris what's happening?
Astronaut - American Spacecraft #1:
Flight, it's coming right at us! The FRONT is OPENING UP! I REPEAT: THE FRONT IS OPENING UP! It's coming right at us...
Houston CapCom:
Chris, Get back in! Get back in!
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