Dracula (the Dirty Old Man) (1969) User Reviews

Funny then porny

[ethylester · 4/10 · 13 October 2003]

The first 20 or so minutes of this film are really hilarious. REALLY funny. The dialogue and overdubbing are so beautiful. This is the best example of bad dubbing I have ever seen. Who knows, maybe they were doing it on purpose. Either way, the words they chose to use as the script are almost like they didn't know the original story and were making it up as it went along. Telling jokes the whole time and making funny comments about everything that you wouldn't normally hear a character in a movie say. They cut on each other and talk about how they have to go to the bathroom and juvenile things like that. I doubt it translated much at all from the original.

After the funny parts at the beginning (like the opening monologue about the blue mountains), the movie goes downhill and becomes monotonous. It's like soft core. But it's sort of rude! Dracula gets these women naked and then insults them because they have small breasts or are too heavy or something. Usually you have a naked woman on the screen and everyone is excited. But Dracula is very snooty and picky! It's sort of funny, but also sort of mean. Especially since I don't think he was supposed to say those things originally.

A funny movie because of the new script. The best parts are at the beginning. The wolf man is very well done. Dracula is kind of sexy. The naked woman are too much for me. Funny then porny.

Bound to become a cult classic

[twotrybe · 4/10 · 7 December 2013]

There are films that are so bad that they are stupid good. You can't believe it was made and yet, there it is right in front of you. The makers of Dracula (Dirty Old Man) must have said screw it, we don't give a damn after things went wrong, mainly the audio. What they did was dub over the bad part and went totally off world with the dialogue. Dracula Alucard has a Jewish accent or what the person doing the voice over decided to give him. Most of the over dub appears to take place in the cave scenes. There is a woman who is doing the voice overs as well and it seems as if she is doing all the females voice over. She's funny when you see one of the naked chicks rubbing her wrist as the ropes are removed and she replies, "He stole my watch". You have to listen close to what she is saying as with all of the dialogue to catch the stupidity.

It seems like they never took themselves too seriously after they messed up the audio. It reminds you of that old cinema parody show, Mystery Science Theater 3000, before there was a Mystery Science Theater. And there is a chase scene towards the end of the film where Dracula and the "Wolfman" is chasing a naked woman around in the cave and they just blatantly rips off the theme from the old TV show, Batman. This is a college frat boy blunt smoking dream. You've got naked chicks, unbelievably bad dialogue, the Wolfman going down on a chick, naked girls tied up and a guy with a chest so hairy it looks like he's wearing the back hair of Seth Rogen 20 times over.

Repetitive trash.

[BA_Harrison · 2/10 · 13 July 2019]

A very low-budget and silly '60s sexploitation flick in which every character has been badly dubbed in-studio with corny comedy dialogue, Dracula (The Dirty Old Man) somehow manages to make frequent female nudity and soft-core sex boring.

Repetition is the order of the day, the film opening with a baffling voice-over that repeats the phrases 'beautiful hill' and 'blue mountain' more times than anyone could ever care to hear. The film then proceeds to repeat the same supposedly sexy formula over and over, with Alucard/Dracula (Vince Kelley, alternating between a Jewish accent and Transylvanian) stripping each girl brought to him by his assistant Irving Jackal-man (Billy Whitton), tying them up, fondling their body, and biting them on the breast.

I guess this wouldn't have been too bad had all of the women in the film been absolute scorchers, but only two of the ladies are certifiably hot - the stranded motorist (Rebecca Reynolds) and Susan (Adarainne) - and only the latter gets her kit off.

The action occasionally strays into iffy territory with Jackal-man raping two of his victims (continuing to hump away even after one has died), but the majority of the film is pure 'meh!': badly shot, poorly edited, with lousy 'special effects' (including a fake bat on a stick), and a mundane jazzy lounge muzak soundtrack.

Best of a bad genre

[rlcsljo · 5/10 · 11 January 2002]

I have seen a lot of "sexy shockers", but this one is definitely the top of the line (for a pretty low line). Using a badly dubbed fake jewish accent (no wonder Dracula was afraid of the cross--he's a Jew!), and special effects that are entirely quick cuts, he turns a playboy newspaper reporter into "Wolf Man"--and what a wolf he is! He kidnaps sweet, mostly young things for his "master" and what dracula doesn't molest, "Wolf Man" rapes himself(girls are nude, guys mostly keep their clothes on)! For 1969, the girls in this movie appear to be in pretty good shape and most of it appears to be natural.

This movie is a "must own" for fans of this genre!

Apparently Dracula was a horny Jewish guy.

[[e-mail] · 1/10 · 22 March 2006]

I haven't seen this film in awhile, but remember it pretty vividly. The film was obviously shot on a really low budget and without any real actors. It has a kind of "Manos" feel to it, but with nudity and even worse special effects. There are bats that are obviously on wires and some pretty cheesy costumes. The guy doing Dracula's voice sounds like an old Jewish man (I don't know where the hell they got the idea to make Dracula Jewish, considering he was Transylvanian). The only thing that I liked about this movie is that it didn't take itself seriously at all.

Count Dracula is living in an abandoned mine in the middle of nowhere. He invites a local reporter to visit him (he goes under the pseudonym of Alucard, hee hee hee, like nobody's ever heard that before). When the inept reporter gets there, Dracula turns him into a pretty crappy looking wolf man, named Irving Jackelmann (enough with the Jewish jokes already). Dracula then sends him out to catch beautiful girls for him to tie up, love up and drain dry. Dracula takes a hankering for the reporter's girl friend and ends up chasing her around his cave.

The opening ten minutes have some really awful stream of consciousness speech by the reporter involving the blue mountains, behind the blue mountains, behind the blue mountains (we get it already). Dracula's accent is just plain annoying. Irving Jackelmann also proves to be pretty bad. The chase scene, for the love of God, was only a nude woman running around the same set for an excruciatingly long time. The nudity can't save it and the jokes, although trying hard to be campy, are just plain dumb.

Avoid unless you can spare a few brain cells.

Dracula and Werewolf Perverts

[Michael_Elliott · 23 May 2015]

Dracula (The Dirty Old Man ) (1969)

* 1/2 (out of 4)

Count Alucard (Vince Kelley) is a pervert and needs a supply of young naked women so he turns a man (Billy Whitton) into a werewolf who goes out and gets them. The werewolf brings the women back to Alucard who chains them up in his basement, rips their clothes off and has a good time.

This sexploitation movie is far from being awful but at the same time it could have been much, much better with a little more effort. Dracula THE DIRTY OLD MAN is pretty much a reason for people in 1969 to throw down a buck and see naked women and there's no doubt that there are plenty of naked young woman on display. If that's what you're into then you're going to see countless breasts, butts and other regions of the female body. If you're looking for plot..... Well, this isn't going to be the movie for you.

There are some hilarious moments scattered throughout the film, although not all of them are intentional. The film was shot silent and it's clear that they wanted this to be a "comedy" about a perverted vampire and werewolf. The voice-over dialogue has a few funny moments throughout including one about Dracula's mother bat. Most of the comedy is unintentional including the hilarious werewolf costume, which is pretty much just a mask and at times you can see it coming off of the actors head. This really puts you in an Ed Wood frame of mind and especially the film he wrote ORGY OF THE DEAD.

The biggest problem with the film is that nothing really happens in the 69-minutes. We get the same thing repeated over and over and over and over. The werewolf kidnaps a woman. She is chained up. Her clothes are taken off. Next woman. A little more thought could have made for a much better movie but fans of sexploitation will still want to watch this at least once.

Dracula (The Dirty Old Man) (1969) BOMB

[JoeKarlosi · 1/10 · 19 March 2005]

This is a really awful "comedy" film about a vampire who turns a guy into a werewolf so wolfie can kidnap girls and bring them back to a cave for his master to feel up. Even the wolf gets to have sex with a couple of them. We do get to see some naked chicks but that's about it.

It could have worked as a pretty gruesome movie if it had been played straight (don't ask me how); instead, they opted for the comedy routine, and it's about as funny as a car wreck. The finished product plays like a terrible episode of the MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATER television show, where the original sound seems like it's been turned off so a group of dummies can try to narrate their own stupid dialogue over the action, in between guzzling their six packs. 0 out of ****

Dracula and his friend get women night after night

[zaza-3 · 1/10 · 24 November 1998]

A big piece of ****! But the scene with the werewolf is so ridiculous, you won't believe it! Also, consider that even in original version it's not synchro. Super low budget movie.

Actually, this is a good movie to watch when you wanna have fun with your friends. Hard to find also. A must see for the bad movies fans!

What a mess!

[BandSAboutMovies · 4/10 · 27 December 2023]

Directed, written and produced by William Edwards, this movie starts with this line: "I saw a panorama of beautiful hills. However, as beautiful as it may seem, death lurked behind those beautiful hills and beautiful women. I don't know which came first."

Count Alucard (Vince Kelly) has brought a reporter named Mike (Billy Whitton) to his cave and turned him into Irving Jackalman, a werewolf henchman who brings him women to both feed on and make love to. The jackal or werewolf mask is from another movie that Edwards wrote, The Mummy and the Curse of the Jackals, which has five minutes of John Carradine in it.

The problem is that Mike's girlfriend Ann (Ann Hollis, who was also in The Ravager) is so attractive that the vampire must have her even after a whole movie of him tying up women, making out with them and then drinking their hemoglobin.

Producer Whit Boyd also was behind 60s sleaze like Spiked Heels and Black Nylons, Hot Blooded Woman, The Sex Shuffle, Scarlet Negilee, The Office Party, Party Girls and Eat, Drink and Make Merrie. In April 1970, sheriff's deputies in Pensacola, FL seized prints of this movie and I Am Curious (Yellow) from the Ritz Theatre and charged the manager with two counts of unlawful showing of an obscene film and maintaining a public nuisance.

Where this gets even better is that the original sound shot with the movie was so bad and didn't match the footage that the entire thing was dubbed in the studio. As well as additional footage shot in Dallas, using local talent, there are only two voices in this movie and both sound like old vaudeville comedians talking over some jazz instead of any dialogue for most of the film.

It makes this roughie feel almost cute, I almost said, then I looked up and a werewolf was strangling a naked women, who was covered with blood, and still raw dogging - I guess, right? - her.

One of the few actresses in this to do anything else is Sue Allen. She plays Carol in this and is also in the X-rated 1970 movie Cindy and Donna. She would go on to sing in several cartoons, including Yogi's First Christmas.

Brilliant... in a weird and twisted way

[blind Io · 10/10 · 19 February 2004]

Saw this movie a couple of years ago as part of a very very small film festival. I remember we where about 8 or 10 people there, and one of the participants threatent to walk out and have his movie back which kind of scared the arranger since he would loose about 10% of his income on the show. He kept saying that the guy should hold on and wait, the next movie would make everything all right. Sadly this was not so, until Dracula (The Dirty Old Man) was shown (about # 6 in the show I think out of 8). The guy who had complained was, like the rest of us, completely shocked. The completely ridicuoles dialog and everything cramped into the movie to make it appear longer, the sudden scene with no connection to the rest of the plot of older man with a young girl (probably the producer wanting to get something out of the nude girls himself, and also by far the most pretty girl in the film) and the naked women being raped by a fully dressed werewolf saved the festival for that guy complaining, completely taking back everything he had said and praising the show for being so strange he could do nothing else but love it. And the arranger saved is 10% loss.

Sometimes you have to let art flow over you

[troywhigham-814-917107 · 7/10 · 10 October 2013]

*** SPOILER ALERT *** There's a special place in my heart for movies that try to be more than they should really be, and this is one of those movies. It almost makes me wish it was still possible to make this type of movie, but unfortunately the easy access to digital cameras, posting on the Internet, and digital downloading have made the panache of these films irrelevant. In other words, anybody can make this movie in a couple of weekends with some willing girlfriends and turn out something with better sound and special effects, and that cheapens the appreciation of these old-school nudie cuties.

Nonetheless, this movie should be taken for what it is - a low-budget sex-comedy that sought to become famous by shocking the Midwest moral sensibilities of its intended audience (which would be men). How this escaped becoming a drive-in staple is beyond me. "Ilsa: She-Wolf of the SS" is more shocking, "Halloween" is more scary, and "Bloodsucking Freaks" is more campy. Still, this movie does have some redeeming traits. For one thing, it has a decent plot concept. Second, the women are full-nude. Third, well, the women are full-nude. That counts for a lot in this genre.

The general premise is that Dracula has found his new home in a cave, like any bat would. Considering that this film was made thirty years after Lon Chaney donned a cape, the special effects aren't any better (if anything, they're worse). But that adds to the charm. Its as if the producer is saying, "Look, I had to communicate a plot device to you, and I couldn't do what I wanted so I did what I could. OK?" So don't be hating too much on cloddy special effects. Just suspend your disbelief a bit more.

Like all vampires before him, this one needs a helper, so he tricks a reporter into coming into the Bat Cave, where Dracula changes him into a werewolf-jackal thing, which looks a lot like a bad wolf costume in a decent (for the 70's) leisure suit. In order to be cured of the jackal-ness, the reporter must fetch the vampire fresh, young women so that he can drink their blood. The women he fetches are attractive by 70's standards and surprisingly don't have tan lines, which leads to me wonder about the casting director's methods because obviously they were cast for their bodies and not their acting credits. In total, there are six women - blonds, brunettes, and a redhead. The redhead is by far the most attractive and gets the most screen time and acting opportunities. Three of the women are bound crux-style in the cave, to be used for feeding. Instead of biting their necks, he bites their breasts, so they're kept nude during the entire film (always a plus in a film like this). A hot brunette is molested by Jackalmann in a soft-porn sequence, then killed (a shame, really). Lastly, the hot redhead (the reporter's girlfriend before he became Jackalmann) is taken into the cave where Dracula attempts to rape her. Jackalmann tries to fight him off, but is defeated. During the scuffle, the hot redhead attempts to escape but gets lost. She's recaptured and Dracula tries again to rape her. Instead, Jackalmann intervenes again. By now the sun is starting to come up and Dracula must return to his coffin. But it is too late. He burns up in the rays of the sun, the captive women fade away into nothingness, Jackalmann returns to being just a reporter, and the redhead wakes up naked in the cave with her reporter boyfriend just as confused as she is. She gets dressed, but not for long, for obviously they had gone into the cave to have sex, had a bad trip on something, and never consummated their love-making. So, they get to it! Any movie that has that as the epilogue must be alright in my book.

My advice - don't watch this movie with the sound on. You don't need it. Sound never worked at drive-ins anyway. You can follow the plot just fine by looking at the screen in-between kisses with Marybeth Rottencrotch and fumbling with her bra strap clasp through her sweater. Don't watch it because you expect high-quality filmmaking. Watch it because you expect low-quality entertainment that's high on nudity and short on plot.

Delightfully smutty soft-core horror comedy trash

[Woodyanders · 8/10 · 28 May 2019]

Newspaper reporter Mike Waters (dorky Billy Whitton) falls under the evil spell of Count Dracula (goofy looking Vince Kelley, who's dubbed to sound like a Borst belt comedian!), who transforms Waters into an obedient werewolf lackey named Irving Jackalman and makes Jackalman go out to abduct young female victims that Dracula needs for their blood.

Man, I just don't get the hate for this one: We've got an uproariously cornball sense of blithely shameless lowbrow humor, the werewolf looks like he's wearing a cheap dimestore Halloween mask, loads of sidesplitting jokey dubbed-in dialogue that includes a simply priceless (and redundant) opening monologue, hilariously hokey (markedly less than) special effects (gotta love the obvious rubbery vampire bat on a wire!), lots of tasty bare distaff skin, and even some hot rapey werewolf action. A real dippy hoot.

A Cheesy Sleazy Dirty Trashy Grindhouse Flick!!!

[Pumpkin_Man · 10/10 · 4 August 2019]

Seven years ago, I stumbled onto a dvd called 'Monsters Crash the Pajama Party Spook Show Spectacular' and it's filled with fun spooky goodies. One thing they have is a short clip of a man going to a drive-in theater with his date. He leaves and goes to the concession stand. When he comes out, he randomly transforms into a werewolf and looks like he's kidnapping his date and takes her off somewhere. It wasn't until recently that I learned that scene was apart of this movie, so I wanted to watch it. It is filled with sleaze, trash, naked women, Dracula and the werewolf basically tying these poor girls up and having their sexual way with them, that's basically the whole plot.

Dracula is awakened in a cave and stumbles across a reporter named Mike Waters. He turns Mike into a werewolf so he'll bring Dracula women to feed on and have his way with. This happens 4 or 5 times. This movie is basically a silly cheesy stupid porno. The dialog is over-dubbed and it's hilariously bad. Dracula himself is hilarious to look at and just randomly talks nonsense to himself. It has a great 1960's grindhouse feel to it. I feel like I'm gonna have a love/hate relationship with this movie. It's 'The Room' of vampire movies. If you love sleazy grindhouse flicks, you might enjoy DRACULA, THE DIRTY OLD MAN)!!!

Dubbed to be Funny

[qormi · 9/10 · 11 October 2019]

Just as in Allen's " What's Up, Tiger Lily?", this was a cheap horror film dubbed with new lines for laughs. It worked. Very funny movie.