- Cosmo Reif: But, I thought, you were like my girlfriend.
- Honey: Cosmo, I like you. Of all the people that pay to have sex with me, I like you the best.
- Steve: What did I just tell you? Please do not touch anything that's part of the driver's console. It's not safe. Besides, everything is set the way I like it.
- Creepy Guy: Hey, look at all those asses. Room three is chock full of asses!
- Jasmine: Hello everyone.
- Creepy Guy: Alright, Jasmine has got the best ass!
- Cosmo Reif: Do you remember talking to me last night?
- Steve: No, did I call you?
- Cosmo Reif: I called you.
- Steve: Oh, good.
- Cosmo Reif: You sounded...
- Unison: Weird.
- Steve: I can get weird at night. It's nothing. You won't say anything to anyone, will you?
- Cosmo Reif: No.
- Steve: Good man.
- [pause]
- Steve: Is this a car?
- Cosmo Reif: I took a Yoga class this morning.
- Steve: Really?
- Cosmo Reif: I thought it might help me to relax.
- Steve: I've tried that. I've tried everything. Glug, glug, glug - that's what works for me.
- Cosmo Reif: Don't you want to take that toilet paper off your face?
- Steve: I really care if these guys see me this way.
- Cosmo Reif: Fine, just doesn't seem very professional to me.
- Gordon: Listen to me, you are our new hitman. I'm the boss now. I'm not going to carry you like Max did. This is your new job. You're going to make a lot of money. The hours are great, you hang out most of the time, it's fun!
- Cosmo Reif: Okay.
- Gordon: Now get the fuck out of here.
- Cosmo Reif: You're bleeding. A lot.
- Steve: No shit.
- Cosmo Reif: It's going to get on the upholstery.
- Steve: Open the fucking door!
- Steve: If you've never been on a date before, how did you ever get laid?
- Cosmo Reif: You know, different ways...
- Steve: Hookers.
- Cosmo Reif: Yeah.
- Steve: And you've never had a girlfriend...
- Cosmo Reif: No, never. I *have* been seeing the same hooker for a while.
- [last lines]
- Jasmine: Okay, this can work.
- Cosmo Reif: [puts his gun down] That was close.
- Jasmine: Yeah.
- Cosmo Reif: Champagne?