Dead Man on Campus (1998)

Corey Page: Matt

Photos 

Quotes 

• Matt : [after he gets caught singing a show tune by Cooper]  Oh fuck me!

  Cooper : What were you just doing?

  Matt : What? Nothing!

  Cooper : Oh no, don't tell me nothing, you were just singing a show tune!

  Matt : You're crazy, I'd never do that.

  Cooper : You can't be suicidal if you're singing show tunes!

  Matt : I am suicidal.

  Cooper : You're not even depressed!

  Matt : Of course I'm depressed, look at me.

  [hunches over] 

  Matt : I'm very fucking depressed.

  Cooper : You fucking poser!

  Matt : [loses his accent]  Hey man, I'm not a fucking...

  Cooper : You're not even British!

• Matt : [singing]  My words in my sperm, spewing forth my tragic...

  Matt : What the fuck do you two what?

  Josh : Are you a musician?

  Cooper : Are you in a band?

  Matt : Kiss... My... Arse.

  Josh : What?

  [Josh and Cooper look at each other puzzled] 

  Matt : That's the name of the bleeding band.

  Josh : Oh, you're gonna be playing the big pre-finals party.

  Matt : Yeah, that's right - if I'm still around.

  Cooper : What do you mean?

  Matt : And who the fuck are you? Fucking Kurt Löder?

  Matt : WOULD YOU PISS OFF AND SHUT MY FUCKING DOOR!

  [Josh and Cooper hurriedly close the door, but remain in the room] 

  Matt : Piss off!

  Josh : Oh, Piss off.

  Cooper : [On the way out of the room]  What the fuck does piss off mean?