Jungle 2 Jungle (1997)
Martin Short: Richard Kempster
Photos
Quotes
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Richard Kempster : [yelling at the airport] Oh, God! I'm dead! I've lost my house! Where will my children live?
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[Richard, Michael and Mimi exit Jovanovic's office]
Michael Cromwell : Richard, are you out of your mind? Now we're laundering money for the Russian mafia?
Richard Kempster : Yes, we are, and we'll iron it for them too.
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[Michael and Richard are aguing about being a parent, while Richard tries to get Karen out of her room]
Richard Kempster : Oh, what? Are you suddenly Dr Spock here? You've been a father for three days. And you're giving me lessons? Well, that's good.
Michael Cromwell : You sound like an idiot.
Richard Kempster : I'm a parent! Therefore, I'm an idiot! I have spent every day for the last 12 years worrying about my kids. About their safety, about their happiness, about their crooked teeth.
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Michael Cromwell : I should probably take some pictures of Mimi.
Richard Kempster : I can never have enough pictures of my kids. I have like, four hundred albums. I never look at them, but they exist... it's good, you know?
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[after Michael and Mimi depart from a taxi cab]
Michael Cromwell : We're meeting this guy at a fish stall?
Richard Kempster : No, no. He is ABOVE a fish stall.
Michael Cromwell : Much better!
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Richard Kempster : Come out, honey, or Andrew is going to smoke you out.
Andrew Kempster : Cool!
Richard Kempster : [whispering] I was kidding!
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Richard Kempster : That's it, Andrew, bite him! Use those crooked teeth!
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Alexei Jovanovic : You make a fool of Jovanovic.
Richard Kempster : No.
Alexei Jovanovic : In front of my comrades and my community. You waste my time, you try to cheat me!
[Jovanovic takes out a knife]
Alexei Jovanovic : Now, you must pay! Sit still, coward! Now, I teach you never,
[grabs Richard's right arm]
Alexei Jovanovic : NEVER to make fool of Jovanovic again!
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Richard Kempster : What are you doing?
Mimi-Siku : Feed Matica.
Richard Kempster : What's "Matica"?
[sees the tarantula in the basket]
Richard Kempster : *louder-than-average-screaming*