Galaxy Quest (1999)

Enrico Colantoni: Mathesar

Photos 

Quotes 

• [Trying to explain TV to the Thermians] 

  Gwen DeMarco : They're not ALL "historical documents." Surely, you don't think Gilligan's Island is a...

  [All the Thermians moan in despair] 

  Mathesar : Those poor people.

• [Sarris forces Jason to tell Mathesar he's an actor on a TV show] 

  Jason Nesmith : I'm not a commander. There's no "National Space Exploration Administration." We don't have a ship.

  Mathesar : [looking at TV screen]  But there it is...

  Jason Nesmith : [gesturing with his fingers]  The ship is that big.

  Mathesar : But inside, I see many rooms.

  Jason Nesmith : You've seen plywood sets that look like the inside. Our beryllium sphere is... is wire with plaster around it. And our digital conveyor is... it's Christmas tree lights. It's a decoration. It's all fake. Just like me.

  Mathesar : But why...?

  Jason Nesmith : It's difficult to explain. On our planet, we, uh... we pretend to... to entertain. Mathesar, I am so sorry. God, I am so sorry.

• Mathesar : We were hoping you could come with us. Our people have no commander.

  Commander Peter Quincy Taggart : Mathesar, I think your people have a great commander, sir.

  [salutes him] 

• Jason Nesmith : Maybe I should get some pants on. Come on in.

  [looking for his pants, bends over and moons the Thermians] 

  Mathesar : Commander, standing here in your presence is the greatest honor we could ever have hoped to achieve in our lifetimes.

  Jason Nesmith : Thanks, I really appreciate that. Could you guys look for another shoe? It looks like this.

• Mathesar : We have enjoyed preparing many of your esoteric dishes. Your Monte Cristo sandwich is a current favorite among the adventurous.

• Mathesar : Deception. Lies. We have become aware of these concepts only recently, in our dealings with Sarris. Often Sarris will say one thing, and do another. Promise us mercy and deliver destruction. It is a concept we are beginning to learn at some great cost.

• Mathesar : The ship is too big to enter the atmosphere. We need to separate or die!