My Parents Are Aliens (1999–2006)
Tony Gardner: Brian Johnson
Photos
Quotes
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Brian Johnson : But I'm closer to me than anyone. We're practically inseparable.
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Josh Barker : Sometimes, Brian, it's like I'm talking to myself.
Brian Johnson : Yeah, I get that! Mostly when I'm on my own...
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Josh Barker : All this time he could have turned me in, but he hasn't.
Brian Johnson : Yeah, what an idiot!
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Brian Johnson : Who mentioned the Head? I'm going straight to Santa! You'll be in SO much trouble!
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Sophie Johnson : [reading about Valentine's Day on the Galactic Guidebook] ... celebrating something called... romance.
Brian Johnson : So it's a day of gladiatorial combat?
Lucy Barker : Romance, not Romans!
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Brian Johnson : I want to sing. I want to dance. I want to fiddle on the roof.
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Sophie Johnson : [her desired wedding ring] Something with gold and diamonds.
Brian Johnson : [off-handedly] Yeah, something like that.
Sophie Johnson : No, something *with* gold and diamonds.
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Brian Johnson : [flipping a coin] Two of hearts!
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Brian Johnson : [Brian has decided to become a knight and has telephoned a zoo in his search for a dragon to slay] Hello there, do you have any dragons? Well, do you have anything that looks like a dragon? A lizard, you say? Does it breathe fire? ...No. Well, okay, can I chop off its head?
[short pause as person on phone talks]
Brian Johnson : Actually, I'm not sure it's possible to do *that* to yourself.
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Brian Johnson : Everyone should have something people can remember them by, a neon sign is one of them.
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Brian Johnson : Cupid hath pierthed their hearths with hith arrowth.
Sophie Johnson : Thorry?
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Brian Johnson : Freaking nutcase!
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Brian Johnson : [reading the book's spine] Shakespeare, by Romeo and Juliet.