- Owner: What type of wife do you want?
- Nikolai Nikolaevich: Uh, let me see. I do not care what she looks like, provided she is beautiful. I do not care how old she is, provided she is young. And, I do not care how poor she is, provided she has plenty of money.
- Owner: You know what you'll get when you marry her?
- Nikolai Nikolaevich: Sure, a divorce.
- Owner: You'll get a thousand heads of cattle.
- Nikolai Nikolaevich: What good are the heads without the rest of them?
- Nikolai Nikolaevich: For you I would swim the highest mountain, climb the widest river, fight the world, conquer armies.