Elf (2003)

Artie Lange: Gimbel's Santa

Quotes 

• Buddy : [Confused]  Who the heck are you?

  Gimbel's Santa : What are you talkin' about? I'm Santa Claus.

  Buddy : No, you're not.

  Gimbel's Santa : Uh, why of course I am! Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho.

  Buddy : Well, if you're Santa, what song did I sing for you on your birthday this year?

  Gimbel's Santa : Um, Happy Birthday of course. Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, ho. How old are you son?

  Kid with Santa : Four.

  Gimbel's Santa : You're a big boy. What's your name?

  Kid with Santa : Paul.

  Gimbel's Santa : Now what can I get you for Christmas?

  Buddy : Paul, don't tell him what you want, he's a liar.

  Gimbel's Santa : Let the kid talk.

  Buddy : You disgust me! How can you live with yourself?

  Gimbel's Santa : Just cool it, Zippy.

  Buddy : You sit on a throne of lies.

  Gimbel's Santa : Look, I'm not kiddin'.

  Buddy : You're a fake.

  Gimbel's Santa : I'm a fake?

  Buddy : Yes!

  Gimbel's Santa : How'd you like to be dead, huh? Ho, ho, just kidding.

  Buddy : You stink.

  Gimbel's Santa : I think you're gonna have a good Christmas, all right.

  Buddy : You smell like beef and cheese, you don't smell like Santa.