George of the Jungle 2 (2003 Video)

Thomas Haden Church: Lyle Van de Groot

Photos 

Quotes 

• Sally : The old witch says the muscleman keeps the deed in his underwear.

  Lyle : That's disgusting.

  Kowalski : Yeah, but at least it'll be easy to find.

  [Opens closet and finds tons of loincloths] 

  Lyle : [gets passed some]  These look familiar.

  [gets passed more] 

  Lyle : Obviously he was planning to stay for a while.

  [gets passed more] 

  Lyle : You would think at some point, Ursula would recommend a zebra pattern.

• Beatrice : You remember my son-in-law, George.

  Lyle : I do. George, clearly the best man won, but no hard feelings. Shake?

  [George shakes whole body] 

  Ursula : What are you doing here? I mean, last time we saw you, you tried to have George killed, Ape captured, and dragged me off to marry you.

  Lyle : That actually wasn't me, kitten. That was the altitude sickness.

• Lyle : [to the Narrator in annoyance]  I think I speak for everyone including the audience when I say this constant stream of annoying alliteration IS ANNOYING!

• Narrator : Yes, that's Ursula's foppish former fiancé, Lyle Van de Groot. You remember the graceful Van de Groot from the first movie.

  [the Narrator refreshes the audience's memory by showing the scene from the previous film when Lyle fell into some elephant droppings in the jungle] 

  Lyle : [humiliated and annoyed with the Narrator]  Was it really necessary to show that scene?

• Lyle : I haven't been this disappointed since the sixth grade, when my sister stole my Shaun Cassidy lunchbox.

  George : George confused.

  Lyle : Shaun Cassidy was a popular TV character in the late 70s, along with Parker Stevenson. I followed both their careers, actually.

  George : George not confused about Shaun Cassidy, George confused about unhypnotizing.

• Narrator : Lyle and the women were still searching our simple simian's shorts.

  Sally : What now? It'll take us years to go throught the rest of these.

  Narrator : And it would have too, had the precise, practical, pragmatic Ursula not labeled them.

  Lyle : [searches one]  Ooh-ooh feathers.

  [searches another] 

  Lyle : Hyena burger.

  [searches a third one] 

  Lyle : Wait a second. Deed.

• Narrator : Lyle was celebrating getting the deed in a typically mature fashion.

  Lyle : [singing]  I have the deed, I have the deed, this is the deed I have, I have the deed...

  [Beatrice trips him] 

  Lyle : Aah!

• Beatrice : We're dead meat.

  Lyle : I thought I was making progress.

  Beatrice : That ape has a better chance of running off with her than you do.

  Lyle : He does? Where have you heard?

• Lyle : [over phone to Beatrice, about deed]  Turns out your idiot son-in-law has it. But where does he keep it.

  Beatrice : I'll ask him.

  [to George] 

  Beatrice : George?

  George : Hmm?

  Beatrice : Where do you keep the deed to Ape Mountain?

  George : George hide in buttflap.

  [walks into vine and trips] 

  Beatrice : Enchanting.

  [to Lyle] 

  Beatrice : He keeps it in his underwear.

  Lyle : Now, the only question is how do we get him and his underwear back here, so I can take it?