Michael Imperioli: Stu Ungar
Quotes
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Stu 'Stuey' Ungar : See, life is a people game, too. Only... the emphasis is just a little bit different.
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Stu 'Stuey' Ungar : [to a poker dealer] Why don't you just fuckin' kiss me, okay, because you've been fuckin' me all night, anyway!
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Stu 'Stuey' Ungar : [narrating] Some people said I was crazy to take a dominated hand like Ace-four against Ace-eight. But, wherever you are, you gotta consider all your outs. See, sometimes they save you. But, sometimes you really ain't got no outs at all.
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Vincent : Eat your scone.
Stu 'Stuey' Ungar : Looks like a muffin.
Vincent : It's a scone. It's from Europe. You see? You're... you're boorish.
Stu 'Stuey' Ungar : Boris?
Vincent : Did I say "Boris"? I said boorish. Uncouth. A vulgarian. You...
[Stuey stares blankly]
Vincent : Never mind.
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[last lines]
Stu 'Stuey' Ungar : I was always leaving here with you, wasn't I?
The Stranger : Yeah. You did good anyway.
Stu 'Stuey' Ungar : Really? Thanks. We could play a couple of hands for, you know...
The Stranger : Never much good at cards.
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Gus : So, uh... Stu, you're Max's son?
Stu 'Stuey' Ungar : Yeah. Yeah. I mean, yes, sir.
Gus : He ran a very nice club. My - my condolences.
Stu 'Stuey' Ungar : Thank you.
Gus : But it, uh... It seems he liked the horses. Do you... like horses , too?
Stu 'Stuey' Ungar : No sir.
Gus : Good. Because they spread disease. I won't have that.
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Stu 'Stuey' Ungar : [narrating] The math guys call it "positive expectation". It's how all these big casinos get built. You throw down your cash hour after hour, and the casinos edge on the game just whittles it away. Sometimes it's just a tiny edge, but it's always there. They know if you win, it's just temporary, so they buy you your and your dinner, and they smile and wait for you to lay your money down again until eventually you lose. And that's what we did, too. Just waited for ya. In the sixties, guys who wore cowboy hats and had cutesy names played poker. By 1980, some of them were still around, but they weren't the best no more. The new pros were math teachers, bankers, lawyers, scientists. Guys who stopped in Vegas for a vacation and figured out they could make more money doing this than any shitty 9-5er. Some of them made money. Some went broke and ran back to real life. Our favorite thing was to beat the shit outta some young hotshot. Some jerk-off who dominated his home poker game and thought he could make a livin' playin' it. Just destroy him. And the great thing for us was that Texas Hold'em was such an easy game. You get two private cards, five others are dealt up. Whoever makes the best five-card hand wins. Piece of cake. And more assholes showed up every day to prove they had it knocked. It was a fuckin' feast. 'Cause these donkeys never figured out that the game wasn't about cards. It was about people.
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Stu 'Stuey' Ungar : [narrating] In 1949, Johnny Moss and Nick the Greek played heads-up poker at the front door of Binion's Horseshoe for five months straight. Five fuckin' months! People stood six-deep to watch. In 1970, Binion's had the first Series. Moss won all five games. By '80, there were over three hundred players, twenty events, and three million in prize money. Not that it mattered. You could make more money in side games. It was the fuckin' World Series of Poker, and either you had the chops to win a bracelet, or you didn't.
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Angela : You didn't pay the electric bill again, didn't you?
Stu 'Stuey' Ungar : Shit!
Angela : Yeah. shit. And now they have to come back over and turn it on, again. And I have to call Susan and make something up. It's embarassing, Stuey.
Stu 'Stuey' Ungar : Can't we just pay 'em for the whole year or something?
Angela : No! That's not the way it works! We could put it on a credit card, but we don't have a credit card.
Stu 'Stuey' Ungar : They're a rip-off.
Angela : Oh, yeah. Yeah, and... and the banks steal your money, and the government steals your money, and everybody steals your money. But, you can lose twenty or fifty or a hundred grand bettin' football and it's okay, right, 'cause you got action, right? And that's what's really important, isn't it, Stuey?
Stu 'Stuey' Ungar : You know, sometimes you can be a real cunt, Angie.
