The Andy Griffith Show (TV Series)
The Bookie Barber (1962)
Don Knotts: Barney Fife
Photos
Quotes
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Barney Fife : [concerned about Floyd's cut of his sideburns] Andy!
Sheriff Andy Taylor : Mm.
Barney Fife : Look at this!
Sheriff Andy Taylor : Look at what?
Barney Fife : Can't ya see? They ain't even!
Sheriff Andy Taylor : Well, I'll be dogged, you're right.
Barney Fife : Doggone, I knew it! I told him!
Sheriff Andy Taylor : One ear *is* longer than the other!
Barney Fife : You're almost as funny as Floyd, you know that? Why don't you two team up and call yourselves Frick and Frack!
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Sheriff Andy Taylor : Them fellas goin' into the barber shop there.
Barney Fife : What about 'em?
Sheriff Andy Taylor : Ain't they the same three fellas we saw goin' in there yesterday about this time?
Barney Fife : Yeah. Now that you mention it, they do look familiar.
Sheriff Andy Taylor : Yeah. Don't that seem a little strange to you, customer goin' back to the barber shop the very next day?
Barney Fife : No.
Sheriff Andy Taylor : No?
Barney Fife : No. Didn't you ever hear of a person with a compelsion complex?
Sheriff Andy Taylor : A what?
Barney Fife : Compelsion complex! You know, like when folks gotta be a-washin' their hands all day long, that's a hand-washin' compelsion. Well, what you're lookin' at there, that's a case of hair-cuttin' compelsion.
Sheriff Andy Taylor : All three of 'em?
Barney Fife : Well, all three of 'em's got the compelsion! Listen, you find compelsion nuts all over!