- Emir Abdulla Akaba: Ah, London... it is the most reassuring of cities.
- Catherine Gale: Yes, there are many places I like to visit, but I don't think I'd like to live anywhere else but here.
- Emir Abdulla Akaba: We are sure, Mrs. Gale, that everyone feels so about his own country.
- Umberto Equi: [meaning to insult] Instant cake mixer!
- Lucien Chaplet: What you say, you nineteenth century spaghetti maker, huh?
- Arbuthnot: Dignity, gentlemen, dignity. Let us remember where we are.
- John Steed: [posing as Chef de Viande Sebastian Stone-Martin] A vintage burgundy, the company of a beautiful woman and a Boeuf Bourguignon, that's my recipe for a perfect evening.
- Emir Abdulla Akaba: Such vigilance is unfortunately necessary. We live under the constant threat of assassination.
- Dr. Sir Ralph Spender: Well, your politics is no concern of mine.
- Emir Abdulla Akaba: No. Only my health.
- Lucien Chaplet: [glancing at the food Umberto is preparing] That is truly disgusting. What is it, for the cat?
- Umberto Equi: It's for Cannelloni! Food for the Gods! And for men, not decadent egg white whippers like yourself.
- Lucien Chaplet: That an elephant could make. This...
- [indicating his own dish]
- Lucien Chaplet: ... requires genius.
- Umberto Equi: This is for creampuffs like Arbuthnot.
- [does an impression]
- Umberto Equi: Oh, it's lovely, Mr. Ar- Mr. Lucien, it's beautiful. Aah!