The Beverly Hillbillies (TV Series)

A Bundle for Britain (1968)

Buddy Ebsen: Jed Clampett

Quotes 

• Milburn Drysdale : [Presents Jed with a gift]  With my compliments.

  Jed Clampett : Well doggies! Would you look at that?... What is it?

  Milburn Drysdale : It's a genuine imported Oriental magic music maker.

  Jethro Bodine : Hot dog! A Japanese transistor radio!

• Jed Clampett : We was just wonderin' how everybody was gettin' along over there.

  John Faversham : Quite well, sir, thank you, considering the fact that we're running the castle with a skeleton staff.

  Jed Clampett : They got trouble alright. Their servants are down to skin and bones.

• Jed Clampett : They done sold Queen Mary to Long Beach.

• John Faversham : It's only her majesty's ships that have been sold.

  Jed Clampett : Oh. Things ain't quite as bad as we thought, but they're hurtin' for money alright. The Queen sold her navy.

• Jed Clampett : Mr. Drysdale, I know you been totin' a crushin' burden, but I got good news for you.

  Milburn Drysdale : Good news?

  Jed Clampett : I'm goin' to take my $80 million outa your bank. Fetch in the wheelbarrow, Granny. Well Doggies! It worked already.

  [Mr. Drysdale has passed out on the floor] 

  Jed Clampett : He's sure sleepin' now isn't he?

  Daisy Moses : Just like a baby.

• Montrose : Would you like to buy Hong Kong?

  Daisy Moses : That's that big ape that carried off Faye Wray.

  Montrose : Hong Kong is on the coast of China.

  Jed Clampett : Well, to tell the truth, I ain't too keen on buyin' a Chinese ape.

• Jed Clampett : Sold me Canada for $80 million and a handful of cash.

  Daisy Moses : You bought Canada, Jed?

  Jed Clampett : It's Jethro that deserved the credit. Hadn't been for him, I mighta would up with Borneo. Mr. Drysdale, why don't you and Miss Jane...

  [Mr. Drysdale has passed out] 

  Jed Clampett : Well Doggies! All it takes to catch him up on his sleep is a little good news.