The Beverly Hillbillies (TV Series)
Jane Finds Elly a Man (1969)
Shug Fisher: Shorty Kellems
Quotes
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Daisy Moses : Jed Clampett, you get into your good duds and git over there and buy that cake that Elly May baked!
Jed Clampett : I don't want that thing.
Daisy Moses : That ain't the idea. You gotta buy it before some other man buys it!
Jed Clampett : I don't think there's a man in this town can lift it.
Shorty Kellems : It rolls real good. That's how Elly got it over there.
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Jane Hathaway : May I have my key please?
Shorty Kellems : What key's that?
Jane Hathaway : The key to the room I'm occupying.
Shorty Kellems : I'm afraid there ain't no key.
Jane Hathaway : Why not?
Shorty Kellems : Cuz there ain't no lock.
Jane Hathaway : Mr. Kellems, am I to understand that some local Lochinvar would be free to enter my room whenever he wished?
Shorty Kellems : Um, now that you mention it, yeah. I reckon he would.
Jane Hathaway : Oh! I just love this quaint little community!
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Jane Hathaway : I'm looking forward to a thrilling ornithological adventure.
Daisy Moses : Shorty, have you ever knowed a person that used as many big words as her?
Shorty Kellems : Just one. Don Richardson. He come in here the other day and throwed some words at me that weighed out better than 5 pounds apiece.
Daisy Moses : What was it, Shorty?
Shorty Kellems : Well, he's talkin about this law case and he said somethin other was uh... was uh... incompatible overt offense.
Daisy Moses : Hmm, them is heavy rascals.
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Daisy Moses : Jethro will know what them big words means. He's been plumb through the 6th grade.
Jethro Bodine : What words is that?
Shorty Kellems : Incompatible overt offense.
Jethro Bodine : Ah, that's easy. All you gotta do is break them words down to their root meanings. In, compat, able, overt, offense.
Daisy Moses : What does it mean?
Jethro Bodine : It means: you come in and pat a bull, and you better get over the fence.