- Mrs. Margaret Drysdale: So help me, if those uncouth hillbillies become my social peers, life will cease to be worth living.
- Daisy Moses: Jed, what's ailing you? You know durn good & well your great-grandpappy's name was Ezekiel.
- Jed Clampett: I know, Granny. But what would an old mountain goat like me have to say to the President & Congress? Come on, everybody, let's do the Virginia Reel.