- [after unmasking the Lawndale Mascot]
- Daria: I can't believe it. It's Mr. O'Neill.
- Tom Sloane: And he would have gotten away with it if it weren't for us meddling kids.
- Lester Gupty: How can we ever repay you?
- Daria: I hear uncut diamonds are as good as cash on the open market.
- Ms. Angela Li: Ms. Morgendorffer, where do you think you're going?
- Daria: Slowly insane. But I need to pop in at home first.
- Quinn: Daria, have you seen my new Teenage Superstars magazine?
- Daria: I couldn't help myself. I plastered my walls with its hot sexy pin-ups.
- Quinn: I'll ask Mom.
- [Quinn exits. Helen enters]
- Helen: Daria, have you seen your father?
- Daria: Did you look under the Teenage Superstars magazine?
- Helen: I'll ask Quinn.