Fawlty Towers (TV Series)
The Germans (1975)
Andrew Sachs: Manuel
Photos
Quotes
-
Manuel : Ohh, he hit me on the head.
Major Gowen : No! You hit HIM on the head. You naughty moose!
German Guest : How ever did they win?
-
Manuel : [practicing his English while cleaning behind and beneath the front desk] How are you, sir? You see, I speak English well. I learn it from a book... Hello... I am English... Helloooo...
[Manuel continues as Major walks into the room]
Manuel : [unseen] How are you, sir?... I can speak English.
[Major looks at the moose head on the desk, thinking it's talking to him, and turns away astonished]
Manuel : [popping up for a moment and spotting the major] Ah, hello, Major. How are you today?
[Manuel returns beneath the front desk]
Major Gowen : [Major turns to look nervously at the moose head, not spotting Manuel] Well, buh, buh, buh, I-I-I'm fine, thank you.
Manuel : [back to reciting is lessons] Is a beautiful day today.
Major Gowen : Is it? Oh-oh-oh, yes, yes, I suppose it is.
Manuel : Yes, I can speak English... I learned it from a book.
Major Gowen : Did you? Did you really?
-
Basil Fawlty : Look, uh, go and get me a hammer.
Manuel : Uh, como?
Basil Fawlty : Hammer.
Manuel : Hammer, oh... Oh, hamma sandwich!
Basil Fawlty : Oh, do I have to go through this every time? Look, a HAMMER.
Manuel : My hamster?
Basil Fawlty : No, not your hamster. How could I knock a nail in with your hamster? Well... I could try, no, it doesn't... No, I'll get it. You come here and tidy. You know - tidy?
Manuel : Oh, tidy. Si.
Basil Fawlty : [walking away] Yes, I'll get hkhammer and hkhit you on the hkhead with it hkhard.
-
Mrs. Wilson : [after Basil has explained that the earlier bell was the burglar alarm, not the fire bell] Look, how on earth can you expect us to tell which bell is which?
[Basil sighs in exasperation]
Mrs. Wilson : We haven't heard them yet, have we?
[Looks round at the other guests]
Basil Fawlty : You want to hear them? Right, suits me! Here's the burglar alarm.
[Turns it on]
Major Gowen : Ought we to catch them first?
Basil Fawlty : There *aren't* any.
Major Gowen : Then why does the alarm keep going...
Basil Fawlty : [sighs] Alright, got that? Right.
[Turns the alarm off]
Mrs. Wilson : What's happening now?
Basil Fawlty : [Ignoring her] Now, here's the fire bell, right?
[Turns it on]
Basil Fawlty : It's a completely different sound, listen.
[the guests start to leave]
Basil Fawlty : Well, where are you going?
Mrs. Wilson : Well, there is a drill, isn't there?
Basil Fawlty : [Jumping up and down in exasperation] No, no, no-no-no! This is so you can hear the bell so you know in a moment when I *ring* the bell! What are you doing? Will you come back?
Two women : We're going outside.
Basil Fawlty : No! Look, just listen to it, you old fools!
Two women : What?
Basil Fawlty : Listen to it!
[Manuel enters, gesturing frantically]
Manuel : Fire, fire, everybody out, please...
Basil Fawlty : NO!
[Manuel continues to herd everyone out]
Basil Fawlty : Will you shut up?
Manuel : Out...
Basil Fawlty : [shouting over him] Look, will you shut up?
Manuel : Is fire...
Basil Fawlty : Is *not* fire, is only bell!
[Manuel continues to protest. Polly start to head upstairs]
Basil Fawlty : Where are *you* going?
Polly Shearman : Upstairs.
Polly Shearman : There isn't a drill yet! I'm just showing them what the bell sounds like!