- Norman: You know, I remember one day I was listening to your program, and it was right after my wife died and I was going through kind of a rough patch. You told this guy who was going through the same thing that he should keep pictures of his wife around to help with the transition. That was a good idea.
- Frasier: So you started keeping pictures of her?
- Norman: [who's blind] That wouldn't make much sense now, would it?
- Frasier: [sheepish] Well, no. Well, what did you do?
- Norman: Well, I remembered when we were dating, Helen made this life mask of herself for art class, and I had my daughter dig through the attic, and lo and behold, she found it.
- [He holds up a delicate porcelain mask]
- Norman: This is the way she looked when we met. Isn't she beautiful?
- Frasier: Oh, yes.
- Norman: So you were right. Every night, before I fall asleep, I run my fingers over Helen's beautiful face, and it takes me back to all those wonderful years we had together. It made a world of difference. I want to thank you. You really helped me.
- Frasier: [warmly] You've no idea how nice it is to hear that.
- Roz: You should have seen him, Frasier. He was raring to go, he kept bragging about how good he was and how much fun it was going to be, and he dies on me!
- Bulldog: Hey, it happens to all guys, okay?
- Frasier: Bulldog...
- Bulldog: No, no. This is a pet peeve of mine, doc. Why is it always the guy's fault? You know, if you chicks needed a little less booze to get from "maybe" to "yes," we'd be a lot more alert when the moment of truth arrives.
- Frasier: Bulldog, Roz was playing checkers with an elderly gentleman and he died.
- Bulldog: Oh, well... when I said "We" I didn't mean me, because I don't have that...
- [Frasier and Roz just wait]
- Bulldog: Hey, you're a doctor, that was confidential!
- [Roz is picking up trash on the roadside]
- Roz: About a month ago, I got stopped doing sixty in a thirty-mile-an-hour zone. It was either a huge fine or community service. So here I am. It's a nightmare. Breathing exhaust fumes, using a spatula to scrape up road kills...
- Frasier: Well, at least look on the bright side. You're outdoors, you can enjoy nature, you're beautifying our highways...
- Roz: Frasier, I found an ear!
- [Roz's friend at the retirement home died suddenly]
- Roz: It just seems so unfair.
- [Niles enters]
- Roz: One minute he's lying in the bed, smiling and happy, ten seconds later it's over.
- Niles: For heaven's sake, it happens to every man a couple of times in his life. Why can't you women take it as a compliment?
- Frasier: Listen, have you seen Roz? She's late. My show goes on in thirty seconds.
- Bulldog: You know what? I'd dump her.
- Frasier: That's a little extreme, don't you think?
- Bulldog: No. I fire everybody once a year. Housekeepers, personal trainers, phutt. You know, cut them off before they start copping an attitude. Oh, oh, doctors are the worst of all. You pick up the same disease three or four times, they start lecturing you like it's your fault.
- [holds up chocolate bar]
- Bulldog: Want a bite?
- Frasier: Not if you skipped it to me over a pool of disinfectant.
- Moira: We hit a patch of whitewater, and my dentures went flying into the Colorado river. I damn near dove in after them, they cost more than the whole trip.
- Moira: You know what I say to myself every morning when I look at myself in the bathroom mirror?
- Roz: What?
- Moira: AAHHHHHH!
- Roz: What the hell is that?
- Moira: That's the second thing I say to myself. Well what'd you expect me to say? That your life gets better with every passing year? If you want to hear that, go talk to Mrs. Adelman, she's the one in the TV room wearing the inflatable inner tube around her waist.
- [Norman's beeper goes off]
- Norman: Would you excuse me? It's time for me to take one of my many pills.