- Lucy Ricardo: They're going to kill us.
- Police Sergeant: Why would they do that?
- Lucy Ricardo: So they can assume our identities and blow up the capitol.
- Police Sergeant: This is serious.
- Lucy Ricardo: You're darned right it is! These people are spies from a foreign enemy agent.
- Police Sergeant: What are their names?
- Lucy Ricardo: O'Brien!
- Police Sergeant: Lady, have you been nipping the cooking sherry?
- Lucy Ricardo: I'm living on borrowed time. It was only by a very clever ruse that I managed to escape from their apartment.
- Police Sergeant: What was that?
- Lucy Ricardo: I pretended to be a chair.
- Police Sergeant: I don't think the police can help you madam, why don't you call an upholsterer?
- Lucy Ricardo: What do I do?
- Police Sergeant: Don't worry madam, just relax, and one day you may grow up to be a nice big sofa!
- Lucy Ricardo: 10 o' clock in the living room and all's well!
- Ricky Ricardo: 10 o' clock in the bedroom and all is well!
- Fred Mertz: 10 o' clock in the hallway and all's well!
- Ethel Mertz: [muffled] 10 o' clock in the kitchen and all's well!
- Lucy Ricardo: Kitchen inspector.
- [Ethel comes out with a turkey leg]
- Ethel Mertz: Yes sir?
- Lucy Ricardo: Ethel, are you eating on duty?
- Ethel Mertz: No sir.
- Lucy Ricardo: What's that?
- Ethel Mertz: Oh uh, well I'm not very good with a gun so I thought if anybody came in the back door I'd beat 'em to death.
- Lucy Ricardo: I hope he gets here before you eat your club away.
- Fred Mertz: [entering living room] Ho, hee, ho.
- Lucy Ricardo: Fred, what're you doing away from your post?
- Fred Mertz: I'm hungry! And I demand transfer to kitchen.
- [Ricky enters]
- Lucy Ricardo: What do you want?
- Ricky Ricardo: I'm lonesome in there all by myself!
- Ricky Ricardo: Lucy, were you snooping?
- Lucy Ricardo: Yes I was a bad girl and you can spank me tomorrow if there's anything left to spank!