William Frawley: Fred Mertz

Quotes 

• Ethel Mertz : [Fred is installing a new door-lock on the Ricardos' front door, but it doesn't stop Ethel]  What happened?

  Lucy Ricardo : You just broke through Fred's 'burglar-proof chain'.

  Ethel Mertz : Fred, can't you ever do anything right?

  Fred Mertz : [mocking Ethel in a high-pitched voice]  Fred can't you ever do anything right? You're not supposed to come charging in there like a bull out of a chute.

  Ethel Mertz : If you'd'a fixed it right, it wouldn't've pulled out.

  Fred Mertz : With your weight, you could come through that wall without a door.

  Ethel Mertz : Oh, keep quiet, or I'll sit on you.