Just Shoot Me! (TV Series)

In Your Dreams (1997)

Enrico Colantoni: Elliot DiMauro

Quotes 

• Maya : It's always the same. My face gets all scrunched up, my eyes are half closed, and I end up looking like...

  Dennis : Popeye?

  Elliot : A smurf?

  Nina : Eleanor Roosevelt sneezing?

  Jack : What the hell is a smurf?

  Dennis : It's that little blue man on your wife's lunchbox.

• Elliot : You want me to do a photo ID. That's like asking Picasso to paint your bathroom.

  Jack : No, it's like *telling* Picasso to paint your bathroom.

• Elliot : When I was on a photo shoot in Australia, this Aborigine tribesman refused to have his picture taken because he thought I was going to steal his soul.

  Maya : Don't tell me. You got him to relax and took a great picture.

  Elliot : No. He bit me and stole my jeep.

  Maya : And your point is?

  Elliot : Don't bite me.

• Maya : So, this is your studio?

  Elliot : Yep.

  Maya : Shouldn't there be a sign for the models that says, "you must be this dumb to enter"?

• Maya : [about a flimsy nighty]  What is this?

  Elliot : It was for your story on health care.

  Maya : What does that have to do with health care?

  Elliot : She was also wearing a nurse's hat.

• Jack : Come on, people! We need new stories. Any ideas?

  Nina : I got it. How about a ten page layout on the comeback of fur?

  Jack : What comeback of fur?

  Elliot : The one she's been trying to launch ever since she bought those snow leopard skin hot pants.

• Maya : This picture sends the wrong message.

  Elliot : What message are you trying to send?

  Maya : "My name is Maya Gallo, and I'm a professional."

  Elliot : And this says?

  Maya : "My name is Maya Gallo, my naughty girlfriends and I are waiting for your calls."

• Maya : It's too sexy!

  Elliot : I'm not following you.

  Maya : This picture you took of me is too sexy!

  Elliot : I understand the word "too" and the word "sexy", but put them together, it's just gibberish.

• Elliot : No sexual relations between employees? This is an outrage!

  Dennis : Relax. Models aren't employees.

  Elliot : All hail the manual!

• Kristanna : Elliot, what are you thinking about?

  Elliot : Oh, nothing.

  Kristanna : Hey, me too.

• Nina : Wait a minute, you little weasel! "Hemlines shall be in direct proportion to the age of the wearer."

  Dennis : It's very simple: if you wore miniskirts in the '60s, spare us in the '90s.

  Elliot : Yeah, so cover up those bony broomsticks, will ya?