Just Shoot Me! (TV Series)
Twice Burned (1997)
George Segal: Jack Gallo
Photos
Quotes
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Maya Gallo : There are plenty of good schools.
Jack Gallo : I don't want a good school for Hannah. I want the best school, and I can make this happen. I am the Can Do King.
Maya Gallo : Says who?
Jack Gallo : This mug.
[lifts mug that says "Can Do King"]
Maya Gallo : Well, I can't argue with you there, even if I am the World's Greatest Golfer.
[drinks from mug that says "World's Greatest Golfer"]
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Jack Gallo : I must have some connections. Woodbridge. Woodbridge. Who do I know went to Woodbridge?
Maya Gallo : Uh, me? I went to Woodbridge.
Jack Gallo : That can't be right, I would have remembered. There would have been plays and recitals... oh.
Dennis Finch : Those of you on the left side of the tram may want to take out your cameras for this awkward family moment.
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Jack Gallo : I'm entering everyone's birthdays into my computer. Maya, when's yours?
Maya Gallo : You're kidding, right?
Jack Gallo : It's just that you have one of those birthdays that's hard to remember.
Maya Gallo : January first?
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Jack Gallo : I need you to come to Woodbridge with me, to tell them what a great father I am.
Maya Gallo : Oh, you want me to lie.
Jack Gallo : Not lie, just have some fun with the truth.
Maya Gallo : I can have fun with the truth. I used to be good at having fun with the truth. Like when you didn't come to my sweet sixteen party, I told my friends that you were donating a kidney.
Jack Gallo : I'm a giver.
Maya Gallo : And when you weren't there when I had the lead role in Oklahoma, I told them you were in an avalanche.
Jack Gallo : My worst nightmare.
Maya Gallo : And when you weren't at my high school graduation, I told everyone you were hunting Nazis in Argentina.
Jack Gallo : I hate Nazis. Always have.
Maya Gallo : And then there was the time I realized everyone knew I was lying, and that's when having fun with the truth stopped being fun.
Jack Gallo : Please, don't do it for me. Do it for Hannah.
[speaks in high-pitched voice while holding picture of Hannah]
Jack Gallo : Pwease, big sister. I wanna go to the good school.
Maya Gallo : Fine, I'll do it. But that is the most annoying voice I have ever heard.
[opens door, the screeching sound of Cholera Joe Hopper singing is playing outside]