M*A*S*H (TV Series)
Dear Peggy (1975)
Larry Linville: Maj. Frank Burns
Photos
Quotes
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Maj. Margaret "Hot Lips" Houlihan : This is completely against military regulations!
Maj. Frank Burns : Wholly unauthorized!
Maj. Margaret "Hot Lips" Houlihan : You've got some of my nurses in there.
Capt. Benjamin Franklin "Hawkeye" Pierce : I'll rinse 'em off before I return them.
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[last lines]
Lt. : [paces back and forth outside post-op, then sits down on a bench, then begins to kneel in prayer when the door opens - turns] Is he going to make it?
Capt. Benjamin Franklin "Hawkeye" Pierce : Well, we could get bombed, there could be an earthquake, or Frank could operate on him again!
Maj. Frank Burns : Twerp!
Local Koreans (uncredited) : [on Hawkeye's cue] You tell 'em, Ferret-face!
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Colonel Sherman T. Potter : [lecturing Klinger] None of us wants to be here. I don't wanna be here. Radar doesn't want to be here. The doctors, the nurses. Certainly the wounded don't want to be here. But we've got to do our best. Understand, son?
Corporal Maxwell Q. Klinger : I'm trying.
Colonel Sherman T. Potter : Then get your butt in high gear and get back to work!
Corporal Maxwell Q. Klinger : That your last offer?
Colonel Sherman T. Potter : You got it! Out!
Corporal Maxwell Q. Klinger : Yes, sir.
[Klinger exits, as Major Burns enters]
Maj. Frank Burns : Colonel, can I see you?
Colonel Sherman T. Potter : Do I have a choice?
Maj. Frank Burns : It's about Captain Pierce.
Colonel Sherman T. Potter : He sew up your fly again?
Maj. Frank Burns : No, sir.
Colonel Sherman T. Potter : He spit at you?
Maj. Frank Burns : He's stuffing a bunch of personnel into a jeep! Something about setting a world's record.
Colonel Sherman T. Potter : [Chuckles] He's a pistol. Burns, can't you see Pierce is just trying to boost morale?
Maj. Frank Burns : Well, my morale is fine. I love it here.
Colonel Sherman T. Potter : [Stares at Burns] Either you or Klinger is nuts. Now I've got to figure out which one.
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Maj. Frank Burns : More suction, nurse. Stop daydreaming!
Maj. Margaret 'Hot Lips' Houlihan : You're there to assist the doctor, Lieutenant.
Capt. Benjamin Franklin 'Hawkeye' Pierce : Give her a doctor, she'll assist him.