- PC Callum MacIntyre: [Going through Donald's driving record] December 23rd, exceeding the speed limit, viz 82 miles per hour in Park Lane, London.
- Donald MacDonald: One should not be late for luncheon at the Palace.
- PC Callum MacIntyre: Following day, Christmas Eve, ignoring traffic signs relating to a one way street.
- Donald MacDonald: I was only going one way, dammit!
- PC Callum MacIntyre: January 1st, Princes Street, Edinburgh. Driving in excess of the legal speed limit whilst playing the bagpipes.
- Donald MacDonald: It was Hogmanay!