The Monkees (TV Series)

I Was a Teenage Monster (1967)

Michael Nesmith: Mike

Photos 

Quotes 

• Peter : Android, Andy! Andy, wait, I'm Peter, your friend. The doctor is an evil man. He wants to exploit you. You're only a pawn in his hands! A tool for his avaricious ambitions.

  Mike : Avaricious ambitions? Where did he get that?

  Davy : It's in the script.

  Mike : Are you sure?

  Davy : Yes, on page 28.

• Mike : [Talking on the phone]  Eh that's right officer, it's the big scary looking house on the very top of the hill. What? Oh, just a second I'll have to check.

  Mike : [walks over to Dr. Mendoza who is being tied up]  Hey Doctor, what's the name of this street?

  Dr. Mendoza : Rosebud Lane.

  Mike : Rosebud - I thought that was the name of a sled?

• Mike : Ehm, Doctor Mendoza, I sort of assume that you want us to teach your friend Rock and Roll?

  Dr. Mendoza : That's right. Rock und Roll really appeals to the little monster.

  Davy : Oh, it's a child. Is he your son?

  Dr. Mendoza : Yes, I guess you could say he is my own flesh and blood. Hah!

• Mike : Eh, you can't really expect us to teach a monster to sing?

  Dr. Mendoza : Well, he's not really a monster, he's a machine.

  Mike : Well, we can't tutor a computer.

• Micky : [Having given the monster a makeover]  Now how does it look?

  Mike : He looks like a long-haired, nearsighted monster with a guitar.

• Mike : Who in the world are you?

  Dr. Mendoza's Daughter : I am the doctor's beautiful daugher.

  Micky : Oh eh, but what do you have to do with all this?

  Dr. Mendoza's Daughter : Nothing, I'm in the sequel.

• Mike : Hey doctor, you know, if we die, you could go to the chair for this.

  Dr. Mendoza : Hoho, there is very little danger of you dying. Gottfried von Schnitzler says this type of experiment need not be fatal.

  Mike : Who in the world is Gottfried von Schnitzler?

  Dr. Mendoza : Oh, you know Gottfried, he's a little boy who lives down the hill.

• Mike : I don't think $200 dollars is gonna do us any good if we're dead!

  Micky : Yeah, man. We shoulda asked for $250!

• Micky : This place looks like it was condemned before it was built.

  Mike : It looks like a high-rise garbage dump.

• Monster : Groovy man, that's not my bag. Don't get uptight.

  Davy : Hey, he's become a hippie.

  Monster : Let's split, go to my pad. That's where it's at. Groovy? Dig?

  Mike : Oh great, now we got a super hippie on our hands.