- [Jaffe is standing in front of the camera talking to Johnny while shooting]
- Photographer: Y'know, Johnny, you sure can pick 'em!
- Mike Nelson: [as Johnny] You're filming your shirt!
- [a woman is being photographed for smutty pictures, but she is fully clothed]
- Photographer: Johnny, you sure can pick 'em. This is the best one yet!
- Johnny: Glad you like her, because you're gonna see a lot more of her.
- Mike Nelson: [as Johnny] Next film, we may show her elbow!
- Gloria: Now, when I say "let's see those legs", I mean show it all from your toes straight up to your hat!
- Tom Servo: [as ditzy girl] But they stop before that.
- Detective Carson: He didn't have a chance to get rid of it. We've got him with the goods this time!
- Crow T. Robot: And I never had to leave my chair!
- Narrator: [From 'Neat and Clean' short] Brush... and brush... and brush. At least one hundred strokes.
- Mike Nelson: Just keep brushing and brushing and saying the name of our lord and savior!
- [Police raid the photographer's studio while he's photographing bikini clad models]
- Crow T. Robot: Whoa, they're raiding these guys? Imagine the arrest they could make at the beach.
- Crow T. Robot: We're giving you a shower!
- Tom Servo: Oh look, she's surprised, isn't that just darling?
- Gypsy: I'm not getting married... and... ..am I pregnant?
- Crow T. Robot: Oh Gypsy, every woman gets a shower and it's just so lovely!
- Gypsy: Well, I'm pretty sure I'm a woman...
- Crow T. Robot: [giggles] Open that one first Mike, it's from me! Doesn't she look lovely?
- Mike Nelson: It's... pinking shears!
- Gypsy: Oh! Thank you, how very thoughtful, and lovely!
- Tom Servo: Oh, those are just darling crow!
- [Mike takes another present and shakes it]
- Tom Servo: OK, this is from me...
- Mike Nelson: And it is... pinking shears!
- Gypsy: Oh! Oh!
- Crow T. Robot: Just like mine! How darling and lovely!
- Tom Servo: Well yeah, Gypsy! I saw that Crow got you the same thing, and that gave me the idea!
- [everyone laughs]
- Mike Nelson: OK, this one is from Cambot, and it is pinking shears!
- Gypsy: Oh! Better get pinking!
- [gypsy laughs]
- Mike Nelson: OK though, Tom and Crow went on one more...
- Gypsy: Oh let me guess, let me guess! Pinking shears?
- Mike Nelson: Nope...
- Gypsy: Oh... .
- Mike Nelson: Oh I guess it is! Pinking shears!
- [Gypsy laughs]
- Crow T. Robot: Well Tom saw them and I had to agree!
- Tom Servo: How lovely and darling!
- Gypsy: It's from Frank! Listen to this:
- [reads letter]
- Gypsy: "Dear Gypsy, how are you? I'm fine. I'm going to bomb the living bejesus out of Deep 13. Well, it looks like I'm out of room. Best wishes, Frank."
- [suddenly realizes the threat]
- Gypsy: OH MY GOD! MIKE! TOM! CROW! WE GOT TO STOP HIM!
- [goes back to the note]
- Gypsy: "P.S. Hope you like the pinking shears."
- Mike Nelson: We just got to find a way to stop Frank, but how?
- Crow T. Robot: Yeah, that's the sixty-four dollar question... wait! I've got an idea! A door-to-door search! Gypsy, can you give me a schematic of the whole city?
- Gypsy: You want the suburbs too?
- Crow T. Robot: All the way to the sticks! I want to see barns and cows and roosters!
- Gypsy: There goes my vacation!
- Crow T. Robot: Thanks doll face!
- [tires to kiss Gypsy]
- Gypsy: [dsgiusted] Get out of here you lug!
- Tom Servo: All right, all right, all right! Hold everything! Ha ha! Got the report back from the lab, and guess whose fingerprints are all over the ransom notes?
- Mike Nelson: Uh, probably Frank's. He signed it.
- Tom Servo: Oh, that's right I guess...
- Mike Nelson: This is a dead end, a blank wall, an empty check!
- Gypsy: It's no piece of cake, that's for sure!
- Mike Nelson: Wait! Hold it Gypsy, say that again...
- Gypsy: I said, 'It is no piece of cake!'
- Mike Nelson: Potato cakes! That's it!
- Crow T. Robot: Potato cakes?
- Mike Nelson: Remind me to buy you a new hat next payday sweetheart!
- [hugs and kisses Gypsy]
- Gypsy: Wow!
- Crow T. Robot: How does she get a new hat?
- Mike Nelson: But first, I got a very important phone call to make! I have to dial one?
- Gypsy: It's from Frank! Listen to this: "Dear Gypsy, how are you? I'm fine. I'm going to bomb the living bejesus out of Deep 13. Well, it looks like I'm out of room. Best wishes, Frank."
- [suddenly realizes the threat]
- Gypsy: OH MY GOD! MIKE! TOM! CROW! WE GOT TO STOP HIM!
- [goes back to the note]
- Gypsy: "P.S. Hope you like the pinking shears."