Night Court (TV Series)

Giving Thanks (1986)

John Larroquette: Dan Fielding

Photos 

Quotes 

• Christine Sullivan : Mr. Phelps, why are you doing this?

  Cyril Phelps : Because, uh, I'm thirty-eight years old...

  Asst. D.A. Dan Fielding : [pouring a glass of champagne]  Well, so am I!

  Cyril Phelps : And I'm a virgin.

  Asst. D.A. Dan Fielding : [lifts the glass]  Happy landings.

• Asst. D.A. Dan Fielding : All right, so you're not getting any. Big deal. WHAT ABOUT US GUYS WHO ARE? You jump off this thing, plunge down there, splatter all over the side walk... she

  [pointing to Christine] 

  Asst. D.A. Dan Fielding : is going to be very upset... and I'm going to end up playing with the TV remote all night.

  Mr. Freedman : I didn't mean to ruin your evening, it's just, it's just that...

  Asst. D.A. Dan Fielding : [Mocking the jumper]  It's just tha... It's just tha... It's just... Guess what? You can't make up your mind about anything, can you? Well listen, if you're going to stay, stay, if you're going to jump, JUMP.

  Mr. Freedman : Bye.

  [Starts to fall backwards. Dan reaches out, grabs him and pulls him inside] 

  Mr. Freedman : Let go of me.

  Judge Harry T. Stone : Hey! Hey! This man just saved your life... and now, you got to sleep with him.

  Mr. Freedman : What?

  Cop : All right, spineless, let's go...

  Mr. Freedman : Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait... I'm in the book.

• Harry Stone : [Reading instructions]  Step 1, give a swift blow to the victim's back. Step 2, remove any foreign object from the victim's mouth.

  Court Clerk MacIntosh 'Mac' Robinson : Step 3, loosen constrictive clothing.

  [All eyes go to Dan] 

  Asst. D.A. Dan Fielding : [Christine looks beneath her coat, and shrieks. Dan pulls out her garments]  Better to be safe than sorry.

• [Dan's assignation with Christine is interrupted by a jumper on the balcony] 

  Christine Sullivan : What are you doing out there?

  Cyril Phelps : Isn't it obvious? I'm plunging to my death!

  Christine Sullivan : You can't do that!

  Cyril Phelps : Why?

  Asst. D.A. Dan Fielding : Yeah, why?

• Christine Sullivan : Dan, you saved my life.

  Harry Stone : Miss Sullivan, he felt you up.

  Christine Sullivan : Dan, how can I possibly repay you?

  Asst. D.A. Dan Fielding : [Initially laughs it off, until...]  Sleep with me.

• Christine Sullivan : Dan, I can't sleep with you!

  Asst. D.A. Dan Fielding : I understand. There's no reason you should feel obligated.

  Christine Sullivan : There isn't?

  Asst. D.A. Dan Fielding : No, of course not. I mean, after all, what did I do but... grab you from the jaws of death, moments before an agonizing demise?

• Asst. D.A. Dan Fielding : Ow!

  [everyone looks at him] 

  Asst. D.A. Dan Fielding : Oh, I'm fine, it's okay, never mind. I must have just pulled my back out when I carried Christine's prone, lifeless body to safety.

• Asst. D.A. Dan Fielding : Who the hell are you?

  Hotel Manager : I'm the hotel manager, sir, with the champaigne you requested.

  Asst. D.A. Dan Fielding : Oh, great, you found it.

  Hotel Manager : Yes, indeed, though it was a difficult task. After all... Chateau Libido... is not one of our usual brands. Shall I unscrew it for you?