- Parker Chase: 150 lockers and you had to do that in mine.
- Patton Chase: I'm sorry, Parker. The idea of doing it in a stranger's locker is creepy.
- Roger: Look at that guy: too many kids, dead end job, life is a living hell...
- Penny Chase: That's my dad!
- Carol Chase: [to Bob] How could you ignore Patton like that?
- Bob Chase: He's pretty much in your face for someone who only comes up to your knee.
- Penny Chase: If I wanted to see a bimbo jump up and down, I'd put Paige's hairbrush on top of the refrigerator.