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Quotes
Dan's Birthday Bash
Roseanne
Edit
Dan
: You know Vinnie, that new kid I hired?
Roseanne
: Oh you mean that 19 year old Adonis with the washboard stomach?
Dan
: You noticed.
Roseanne
: Noticed hell, I made sketches.
Dan
: Babe, I ain't the man I used to be.
Roseanne
: Yeah, but you know, Dan, you were never the man you used to be.
Becky
: [
Just before leaving to have dinner at her boyfriend's house
] Oh my gosh, I'm so nervous.
Roseanne
: Just don't shoot any milk out of you nose, and you'll be fine.
Darlene
: [
explaining why Dan's not there
] He yelled at Dwight and threw his hammer through the drywall.
Roseanne
: [
to Chip's mother
] Well it *is* Saturday.
Roseanne
: Me and the kids civilized you when you wasn't looking.
Bobo
: Hey, let me ask your question, cuz I gotta know... what do you, and your *fat* wife, think of my new hat?
Roseanne
: [
Dan looks to her
] Just this once.
[
Dan punches Bobo out, they steal his beer helmet and run
]
Becky
: ... Chip and his Mom are going to pick me up, and I have to figure out what to wear.
Darlene
: Why don't you try wearing a bag over you head so they don't see the way you chew.
Becky
: Shut up Darlene. You're just jealous because I'm dating, and you're flat.
Becky
: What if they serve me something that makes me gag, like okra?
Roseanne
: Well, just spit it out into your napkin, you know, roll it up and shove it in your purse.
Becky
: That's gross.
Roseanne
: Not if nobody sees you.
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