Roseanne (TV Series)
Trick Me Up, Trick Me Down (1991)
Roseanne Barr: Roseanne Conner
Photos
Quotes
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Jackie Harris : What's with the blood?
Roseanne : [nonchalantly] Oh, I killed Dan.
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Roseanne : [walks into the kitchen and sees Dan disemboweled, turns around and Roseanne corners her with a knife] What is it, Kathy? I've had a really bad day and now I've got to clean up all of this. You know, I don't know how many times I keep telling myself, it's just like gutting a fish. I swear I was much better with Becky's dad.
Kathy Bowman : Becky's dad?
Roseanne : Yeah, he was blonde too. Oh hey I know, you've got a garbage disposal, don't you?
Kathy Bowman : [cringing] Oh my God... I have to go home.
Roseanne : Oh no, you can't go, Kathy, you'll tell.
Kathy Bowman : [backing up] No I won't, I promise, please let me go!
[backs into Dan who's standing behind her, turns around]
Dan : Liver?
[Kathy screams and runs for the door]
Roseanne : Happy Halloween!
Kathy Bowman : [in shock] That was horrible! Horrible!
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Roseanne : [run out of their room after finding snakes in their bed] Snakes bite and squeeze, this is going too far, Kathy's trying to kill us!
Becky Conner : [laughing] What're you talking about? Kathy's not trying to kill you.
Darlene Conner : Yeah, we are.
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Roseanne : [to Kathy, because she is convinced that Kathy is lying about wanting to seek revenge for a prank pulled on her by the Conners] Oh sure, you think you're better than me now, but when you remember the terrible thing that I did to you today, you will sink to my level like a *rock!*
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D.J. Conner : Mom, where are my hand grenades?
Roseanne : In your bottom drawer. Where else would they be?
D.J. Conner : Oh yeah, right.