Scrubs (TV Series)

My Big Brother (2002)

John C. McGinley: Dr. Perry Cox

Quotes 

• Dr. Perry Cox : You know, Newbie, it's so interesting -- I found I couldn't sleep last night, so, in order to pass the time, I started to make a list of things that annoy me more than you. Anyway, I came up with people who call Wednesdays "Hump Day" and, of course, all Sandra Bullock movies. But now, I'm thrilled to announce, your brother tops the list, which is...

  Dan : Hey, chief! Does this speech have an intermission? 'Cause I gotta go to the lobby and take a wizz.

  Dr. Perry Cox : Aaaactually, I'm not so keen on nicknames from guys that barely know me!

  Dan : [imitating Cox]  Aaaaactually, why don't you tell me what you keen on?

  Dr. John 'J.D.' Dorian : [near tears]  Oh, Dan, no.

• Dr. Christopher Turk : I suggest we do a fem-pop bypass.

  Dr. Perry Cox : Mr. Carney's a frail old man who'd... probably snap in half from a light sponge bath.

  Dr. Christopher Turk : All I'm saying is if we do surgery, we could improve his quality of life.

  Dr. Perry Cox : The guy's a thousand. What's he gonna, take a steamer over to Europe, open up a café, and finally meet that nine hundred-year-old girl of his dreams?

  Dr. Christopher Turk : I made my recommendation.

  Dr. Perry Cox : You stood up for what you believe in, and I respect that.

  Dr. Christopher Turk : Thank you.

  Dr. Perry Cox : Twenty bucks says you kill him.

  Dr. Christopher Turk : You're on!

• Dr. Perry Cox : Let's go. Field trip.

  Dr. Christopher Turk : I got things to do, you know.

  Dr. Perry Cox : Let me guess. You're off to another funeral. I'll make you a deal: you come with me right now, and if you're still late for the graveyard, I will personally scour the obituaries with you this weekend, and we can just go nuts.

  Dr. Christopher Turk : Did Carla put you up to this?

  Dr. Perry Cox : [dryly]  No, it was my idea. I desperately want to be close with you, I just can't figure out how to connect. Turn around. Turn around.

  [Turk turns] 

  Dr. Perry Cox : You see Dr. Wen in there? He's explaining to that family that something went wrong and that the patient died. He's going to tell them what happened, and he's going to say he's sorry, and then he's going back to work. You think anybody else in that room's going back to work today? That is why we distance ourselves. That's why we make jokes. We don't do it because it's fun. We do it so we can get by. And sometimes because it's fun. But mostly, it's the getting by thing.