- Waylon Smithers: [with a very attractive woman] Sir, you knew I was on a date.
- Bart: Mr. Smithers? But I thought you were... you know...
- Waylon Smithers: Oh no, I'm straight. As long as I keep taking these shots!
- [injects shot into arm]
- Waylon Smithers: I love boobies!
- [Bender appears in the car]
- Bender: Alright! You guys are my new best friends!
- Homer Simpson: You wish, loser!
- [he throws Bender out of the car]
- Marge: [eight years in the future, praising technology] It's greeat! We can do *anything* now that Science has invented Magic.
- Bart: ...So that's how Jenda dumped me.
- Homer Simpson: Son, some times people just grow apart, like me and your mom.
- Bart: No, mom dumped you because you blew all our money on this underwater house!
- Homer Simpson: She'll realize she was a fool when... HEY! Come back with my patio furniture!... Stupid flounders!
- Principal Skinner: And now, here's assistant principal Kearney.
- Kearney: Okay, I want a nice, clean prom. That means: no booze, kick, puff, doze, max, stim or turb. Remember: stim kills!
- Principal Skinner: It's what turned superintendent Chalmers into a vegetable!
- Superintendent Chalmers: Skinner! Skinner! Skinner! Skinner!