- [singing along with an R.E.M. song]
- Homer: Leonardo what-his-name, Herman Munster motorcade, birthday party Cheet-Os, pogo sticks and lemonade, idiotic stupid jerk, that's right Flanders, I am talking about you!
- Moe: You can't run a bar in your garage, it's illegal.
- Homer: Bar? This isn't a bar. This is a hunting club.
- Michael Stipe: You lied to us.
- [Michael Stipe smashes a beer bottle and tries to attack Homer]
- Peter Buck: Michael, no.
- Mike Mills: It's not the R.E.M. way.
- Michael Stipe: You're right. Come on, let's recycle these shards and get out of here.
- [while Moe is away, Homer is in charge of the bar]
- Homer: [picks up phone] Hello?
- Bart: Uh, yeah, I'd like to speak to a Mr. Tabooger. First name Ollie.
- Homer: Ooh, Bart. My first prank call. What do I do?
- Bart: Just ask if anyone knows Ollie Tabooger.
- Homer: I don't get it.
- Bart: Yell out "I'll eat a booger".
- Homer: What's the gag?
- Bart: [sighs] Oh, forget it.
- [hangs up]
- [R.E.M. is playing in Homer's garage]
- Peter Buck: Michael, are you sure these guys are millionaires?
- Michael Stipe: Of course I'm sure, would a poor person afford to have a bar in his garage?
- Dr. Bob Kaufmann: Is there a lot of screaming at your house?
- Bart: Well, my dad's always yelling about the white man keeping him down.
- Homer: [while hunting] Heeere, turkey turkey turkey . Tuuuuurkey turkey turkey turkey turkey. Nobody's gonna kill you!
- Moe: I'm burned out on bartending. When I first saw the movie Ironweed I thought "this is for me"! But now, well.. I'm not so sure.