The Simpsons (TV Series)

Insane Clown Poppy (2000)

Julie Kavner: Marge Simpson

Quotes 

• Marge : So, Mr. King, what tale of horror and the macabre are you working on now?

  Stephen King : Oh, I don't feel like writing horror right now.

  Marge : Oh, that's too bad.

  Stephen King : I'm working on a biography of Benjamin Franklin. He's a fascinating man. He discovered electricity, and used it to torture children and green mountain men. And that key he tied to the end of a kite? It opened the gates of HELL!

  Marge : Well, let me know when you get back to horror.

  Stephen King : Will do.

  [writes down a note: CALL MARGE RE: HORROR] 

• Homer : Dear Lord, bless this humble meal. And did you hear about Krusty?

  [laughing] 

  Homer : Whoo, man. I mean, I knew he was a player, but, jeez, a kid?

  Marge : Homer, that's not a prayer. That's gossip.

  Homer : Fine, I'll just discuss heavenly matters. So, how's Maude Flanders doing up there? Is she playing the field? Ooh, yeah, really? All those guys?

  [seeing the family staring in mortification] 

  Homer : Amen.

• Dr. Nick Riviera : With my diet, you can eat all you want any time you want.

  Marge : And you lose weight?

  Dr. Nick Riviera : Uh, you might. It's a free country.

• Marge : Look, Maggie, Christopher Walken's reading "Good Night, Moon."

  Christopher Walken : [reading to a group of children]  Good night, room. Good night, moon. Good night, cow jumping over the moon.

  [freaked out, the children scooch away from him] 

  Christopher Walken : Please, children, scooch closer. Don't make me tell you again about the scooching. You in the red, chop-chop.

• Homer : [stuffing a watermelon with fireworks]  This watermelon won't know what hit it.

  Bart Simpson : I love our Tuesdays together, Dad.

  [he lights the fuse, and they take cover to watch it explode] 

  Marge : [sticking her head out the kitchen window with melon bits in her hair]  Don't you two have a list of chores to do?

  Bart Simpson : Hey, we just took care of that dangerous melon that was threatening our garden.

  Homer : Yeah, we're heroes. But where's our parade?

• Homer : [trying to open a stuck drawer]  Oh, it's hopeless.

  Bart Simpson : [holding up a firecracker]  Or is it?

  Homer : Yeah, it's hopeless.

  Bart Simpson : [more emphatically]  I said, "or is it?"

  Homer : I said, it's...

  [seeing what he means] 

  Homer : Oh.

  Marge : [just as he's about to light it]  Homer, what are you doing?

  Homer : Listen, do you want the job done right or do you want it done fast?

  Marge : Well, like all Americans, fast, but...

  Bart Simpson : [lighting the fuse]  Clear!

  [the explosion blows the drawer out] 

  Marge : [putting it back in and testing opening and closing it]  Hmm. Well, you can't argue with results.