The Simpsons (TV Series)

New Kids on the Blecch (2001)

Hank Azaria: Moe Szyslak, Chief Wiggum, Comic Book Guy, Runner #1, Smash, Commander, Writer #1

Quotes 

• MAD Writer : [the writers of MAD Magazine are in conference]  Why don't we call it "Everybody Hates Raymond"?

  [Everyone laughs] 

  MAD Chairman : Well, we stayed up all night, but it was worth it.

• Admiral : The new administration is shutting down Project Boy Band.

  Smash : Shutting it down? Permission to say that's crazy, sir?

  Admiral : You won't say it's crazy when you see next week's issue of MAD magazine.

  Smash : [seeing the boys in a toilet bowl being flushed by Alfred E. Nueman with the tagline "We Flush the Potty Posse"]  Oh, dear God.

  Admiral : When this satirical bombshell hits the stands tomorrow, your band will have as much recruiting power as a wax apple.

• Lisa Simpson : How could you soil the good name of Star Blitzzz Promotions?

  Smash : Oh, come on, Lisa. We've always used pop stars to recruit people, going back to Elvis. Then there was "Sgt. Pepper's," the Captain & Tennile, and the KISS Army.

• Smash : Bart, I want you to meet and greet the other members of the Party Posse. He's smart, he's soulful, he's Milhouse!

  Milhouse Van Houten : What up, G Money?

  Smash : Next, he'll break your nose, your glasses, and your heart, Nelson.

  Bart Simpson : Wait, these are just guys from school. Who's next, Ralph Wiggum?

  Ralph Wiggum : [spinning in his chair]  Whee! I'm a pop sensation.

• Admiral : Lieutenant Smash!

  Smash : [waking from a daydream and saluting]  Huh? Oh, Admiral.

  Admiral : The hippie fantasy again?

  Smash : They're getting less frequent, sir.

• Comic Book Guy : No one can outrun the Flash.

  [getting stuck in an open manhole] 

  Comic Book Guy : Curses. One of my super-foes has set a trap for me.

• Bart Simpson : Who are you?

  Smash : Oh, you'll find out in due time.

  Bart Simpson : [seeing the placard on the rear-view mirror]  Well, it says here your name is L.T. Smash.

  Smash : The time has come. I'm L.T. Smash.

• Smash : Well, boys, the Party Posse is over, but at least I saved you from a public spoofing.

  Bart Simpson : [the MAD cover flutters to the ground]  Aw, man! We could have been on the cover of MAD.

  Nelson Muntz : They called me "Smelson." Haw-hah!

  Homer Simpson : [laughing with the boys]  Smelson. It's funny 'cause you smell.

• Smash : Okay, your tunes are fly, and your threads are dope. All that's left is the singing.

  Bart Simpson : [reading the lyrics]  "Party Posse, we rule the earth. The greatest band since music's birth"?

  Nelson Muntz : Isn't this song a little boastful?

  Milhouse Van Houten : No one told me there was gonna be boasting.

• Bart Simpson : [cheating to win the Springfield Marathon]  Grazie, Springfield!

  [a crow steals his fake mustache] 

  Runner #1 : He's a phony!

  Runner #2 : Lousy cheater!

  Sideshow Mel : I demand a re-race!

  Moe Szyslak : I got a better idea. Let's have a fun run on his trachea.