- [with Conky strumming the guitar, everyone sings to the tune of 'Home on the Range']
- everyone: Playhouse, playhouse on the range / where things are a little bit strange / where often is heard the secret word...
- Cowntess: ...and the cows are all happy all day-ay-ay-ay!
- [Chicky Baby recites a 'beat generation'-style poem for an increasingly confused Pee-Wee, as bongos and a jazz bass play in the background]
- Chicky Baby: 'Reality' is the name of this poem. Reality is so un-real, like, uh, walkin' up a flight of stairs that lead nowhere. Swimming in mashed po-ta-toes. Where's the gravy, baby? If you wish to make a call, please hang up and dial again. A bunch o' balloons, a funny clown. Is the circus in town? The end.
- Dirty Dog: Whoa!
- Cool Cat: Wow!
- Pee-wee Herman: [hesitant, trying to be nice] Gee, that was, um... really unusual.
- [Pee-wee and Conky are playing checkers on Magic Screen]
- Pee-wee Herman: King me!
- Conky: Are you sure you want to move there, Pee-wee?
- Pee-wee Herman: Yeah, I'm sure.
- Conky: Are you sure you're sure?
- Pee-wee Herman: Yes, I'm sure I'm sure.
- Conky: Are you positive you're sure you're sure?
- Pee-wee Herman: Conky, I'm positive. I'm sure! I'm sure! I'm sure! I've never been so sure of anything in my whole life. King me!
- Knucklehead: Knock, knock.
- Pee-wee Herman: Who's there?
- Knucklehead: Boo.
- Pee-wee Herman: Boo who?
- Knucklehead: I'll tell you if you stop crying.
- [laughs and hops away]