- Jimmy Woo: So you're saying the universe created a sitcom starring two Avengers.
- Darcy Lewis: It's a working theory.
- Darcy Lewis: A bonafide joint multi-service response. Really looking forward to the commemorative t-shirt.
- Wanda Maximoff: Who are you?
- Monica Rambeau: Wanda, I'm just your neighbor.
- Wanda Maximoff: Then how did you know about Ultron?
- [conjuring her powers]
- Wanda Maximoff: You're not my neighbor. And you're definitely not my friend. You are a stranger and an outsider. And right now, you are trespassing here. And I want you to leave.
- Darcy Lewis: Twins. What a twist.
- [seeing Woo's look]
- Darcy Lewis: What? I'm invested.
- Monica Rambeau: He was killed by Ultron, wasn't he?
- Jimmy Woo: Did she just say the name Ultron? Has that happened before? A reference to our reality.
- Darcy Lewis: No. Never.
- Darcy Lewis: 1950s, 1960s, and now the '70s. Why does it keep switching time periods? It can't be purely for my enjoyment, can it?
- Jimmy Woo: And I can't believe Wanda and Vision are having a baby.
- Darcy Lewis: You want any?
- Jimmy Woo: Heck, I thought about it for sure. A little Jimmy Woo. Get him a little FBI badge.
- [realizing what she means]
- Jimmy Woo: Oh, you... chip? Sure.
- Jimmy Woo: I, uh, pulled phone numbers for all the residents. I'm only through the Ds, but so far, I got diddly squat.
- Monica Rambeau: So, you can't reach anyone inside and everyone on the outside has some sort of selective amnesia?
- Jimmy Woo: This isn't a missing persons case, Captain Rambeau, it's a missing town. Population 3,892.
- Monica Rambeau: Why haven't you gone inside to investigate?
- Jimmy Woo: 'Cause it doesn't want me to. You can feel it, too, can't you? Nobody's supposed to go in.
- Monica Rambeau: What's the story here, Agent Woo?
- Jimmy Woo: Uh, I've got a witness set up down the road in Westview, and this morning, it looked like he flew the coop.
- Monica Rambeau: Your missing person is in the Witness Protection Program?
- Jimmy Woo: I have contacted known associates, relatives...
- Monica Rambeau: And let me guess, none of them have seen him either?
- Jimmy Woo: No. None of them have ever heard of him. Something seemed hanky to me, so I took the first flight out of Oakland to interface with local law enforcement, which is when I encountered a new wrinkle.
- Monica Rambeau: What is that?
- Jimmy Woo: [leading her down the road] Pardon me, Sheriff. Would you mind repeating your claim about Westview to my colleague here?
- Sheriff: No such place.
- Monica Rambeau: You're saying the town of Westview, New Jersey doesn't exist?
- Sheriff: It's what I keep telling your G-man here, but he won't listen.
- Monica Rambeau: I see. And, um, I'm sorry, what-what town are you from?
- Sheriff: Eastview.
- Jimmy Woo: Thank you, Sheriff. I'll reach out if we need any further assistance.
- Director Hayward: Is it authentic?
- Darcy Lewis: I'm not sure how to answer that.
- Director Hayward: Is it happening in real time? Is it recorded, fabricated?
- Darcy Lewis: I don't know. I don't know. And I don't know.
- Director Hayward: What do you know?
- Darcy Lewis: My equipment registered an extremely high level of CMBR. That's...
- Director Hayward: Relic radiation dating back to the Big Bang.
- Darcy Lewis: Yeah, entwined was a broadcast frequency. So I had your goons pick me up a sweet vintage TV, and when I plugged this bad boy in, voila, sound and picture.
- Darcy Lewis: [upon seeing Vision on the TV monitors] Look, I know it's been a crazy few years on this planet, but he's dead, right? Not blipped, dead?
- Darcy Lewis: So, you've seen that radio on Wanda's kitchen counter, right? The next time she's washing dishes, which, by my count, happens about once an episode, barf, we'll shoot a signal to that little guy. This transmitter will mimic the frequency of the broadcast, and if my theory is right, allow us to speak directly to her. This is totally gonna work.
- [Woo moves to fiddle with a piece of equipment]
- Darcy Lewis: Don't touch that.
- Agent Monti: What are you getting?
- Darcy Lewis: A colossal amount of CMBR.
- Agent Monti: CM...
- Darcy Lewis: Cosmic Microwave Background Radiation.
- Agent Monti: We've been told the radiation is within a safe limit.
- Darcy Lewis: Uh, it is. For now.
- Agent Monti: Wait, what do you mean...
- Darcy Lewis: Shh. There are longer wavelengths superimposed over the noise here.
- [groaning as she struggles to pick up a desktop-like computer tower]
- Darcy Lewis: I got it.
- [turning it on and adjusting knobs]
- Darcy Lewis: I need a TV. An old one. Like, not flat.
- Darcy Lewis: [after spotting Maria in a "WandaVision" episode] Does she seem okay to you?
- Jimmy Woo: Well, she doesn't appear to be harmed in any way, but that is definitely not the boss lady I met yesterday.
- Darcy Lewis: So, what, deep cover? Monica has to play along?
- Jimmy Woo: With whom? Or else, what? All right. Brass tacks, Dr. Lewis. What are we looking at here? Is it an alternate reality? Time travel? Some cockamamie social experiment?
- Darcy Lewis: It's a sitcom. A 1950s sitcom.
- Jimmy Woo: But why?
- Darcy Lewis: Hey, man, we're working with the same scarcity of intel.
- Jimmy Woo: Is this from the current episode?
- Agent Rodriguez: Aired about two minutes ago.
- Darcy Lewis: What is it?
- Jimmy Woo: What does it look like to you?
- Darcy Lewis: Like a retro version of a S.W.O.R.D. drone?
- Jimmy Woo: Bingo.
- Darcy Lewis: But how did it change and why?
- Jimmy Woo: Uh, to go with the production design?
- Darcy Lewis: Or render it useless.
- Jimmy Woo: Why'd you colorize it?
- Agent Rodriguez: I didn't.
- Darcy Lewis: There's nothing here. One second, Maria is standing right there, and the next, she isn't. Someone is censoring the broadcast.
- Jimmy Woo: But where's Rambeau?
- Dr. Highland: Monica?
- Monica Rambeau: Oh, Dr. Highland, thank god!
- Dr. Highland: I can't believe it.
- Monica Rambeau: Uh, I-I-I was...
- Dr. Highland: Where did you go?
- Monica Rambeau: Well, I've been in her room since she came back from the surgery. I-I, I mean, I... I might've fallen asleep, but no longer than 20 minutes. Dr. Highland, where's my mom?
- Dr. Highland: Your mom, she died, honey.
- Monica Rambeau: What? No. No, no, no, no, you're mistaken. My... my mother... the-the procedure went well. You-you said so yourself. Clean margins. You're discharging her today.
- Dr. Highland: The cancer came back.
- Monica Rambeau: Okay, stop, stop. No, you're... my mom is Maria Rambeau. Look it up. I mean... look-look it up. Maria Rambeau.
- Dr. Highland: Monica, I don't understand what's happening, but you need to listen to me. Maria died three years ago.
- Monica Rambeau: Three? No. No. No, no...
- Dr. Highland: Which was two years after you...
- Monica Rambeau: After I what? After I what?
- Dr. Highland: After you disappeared.
- Jimmy Woo: Director Hayward, between you, me, and the bedpost, I am not confident about this mission.
- Director Hayward: Thanks for the feedback, Jimmy. If only my drones were as forthcoming.
- Jimmy Woo: There's no reason to suspect the perimeter doesn't extend subterraneously.
- Director Hayward: There's no reason to suspect it does.
- Jimmy Woo: Well, we don't know enough about the nature of the threat to send in another agent when the first is yet to return.
- Director Hayward: Someone must really miss you back in Quantico.
- Jimmy Woo: No, sir. Softball season's over, sir.
- Director Hayward: What do we have up?
- Agent Rodriguez: Radar, lidar, sodar, infrared.
- Director Hayward: Cycle through.
- [getting no usable intel]
- Director Hayward: Will someone get me a useful visual, damn it?