- Retired Captain Phillip Brooks: Doesn't matter. I just know. And I'm a pretty good judge of character.
- Leroy Jethro Gibbs: Phil! Your ex-wife cheated on you with the same guy who tried to murder you.
- Retired Captain Phillip Brooks: ..Fair point. Forget I said that.
- Retired Captain Phillip Brooks: Wait! Before you go through with this, have you thought about the tax implications?
- Detective Tom Logan: The what?
- Retired Captain Phillip Brooks: Well, you're planning on killing yourself, right? As an accountant, I'd advise you to at least wait until you have your estate plan in place.
- Retired Captain Phillip Brooks: I helped you catch that murderer last year in the woods. I'm practically an agent.
- Leroy Jethro Gibbs: No, you're an accountant. Last year in the woods, you fell off the trail and you got Fornell shot.
- Retired Captain Phillip Brooks: God, I wish you didn't have such a good memory.